The Vanessa Warrick Story
by Angeleia Kenobi
Summary: Vanessa has moved to New Orleans to live with her Aunt...but why? Is Adam going to come and save her? Sequel to A New Bonanza Story; Rating changed for later chapters
1. Vanessa

Vanessa Warrick wrapped her long fingers around the weed and pulled. It didn't budge. Growling at herself, she hitched up her plain brown skirt and braced her foot against the planking of the white fence around her Aunt Sarah's herb garden, and tried again. It came loose, but sent Vanessa flying onto her backside, skirt now exposing the creamy paleness of her right calf. Blowing out her breath, Vanessa wiped her face with her right arm and stared at the weed in her left hand. "You know," she said to it, getting to her feet and gathering to pile of weeds she'd pulled moments earlier, "it's times like this that make me wish I'd stayed on the Ponderosa." There came a laugh from behind her and she turned to see her aunt watching her from the small porch of her grand New Orleans home. Vanessa let the plants drop into the trash pail and raised her eyebrows at the older woman, "What's so funny?" Sarah walked towards her niece a bright smile on her face, "You were talking to yourself again."

When Vanessa had appeared on her front stoop almost a year ago, Sarah hadn't asked any questions, just led the poor girl into her parlor and let her cry her eyes out. Between the great wracking sobs, dear little Nessa had told her about what had happened. Apparently, there was something about a man named Ethan Lamb, his brother, and how they had conspired to get the Summerset, Nessa's ranch. The two had fled to the Ponderosa to seek the help of the Cartwrights, whom Sarah only knew through reputation, and Nessa had fallen in love with the oldest boy, Adam. She had thought that was the end of her troubles, but that was really where it had started. Vanessa's father had been killed by a Paiute tribe on their way home for that fall, Nessa couldn't possibly stay with the family of her fiance while planning the wedding...that and her father wanted one last winter with his little girl. Nessa had had to take over the Summerset, and had put off her wedding plans, indefinitely. Adam hadn't really like the idea, and had come to the Summerset to claim his bride. They'd had a falling out over the situation, and Adam had left, with no guarantee that he'd ever return. Nessa had given the ranch as a wedding gift to one of her favorite hands and her best friend, and had gone after Adam. But when she'd reached Virginia City, she'd caught wind of Adam's plans to marry another woman, one Laura Dayton. She'd taken for granted that Adam could have been found attractive by another woman, and as such had taken the news hard. That was when she'd booked passage on the stage and then a train to New Orleans to start a whole new life.

Nessa shrugged and grabbed the handle of the pail, heading for the manure shed down the hill. After a few steps she turned back to her aunt, "You coming along or am I going to talk to myself the whole way there and back?" Sarah picked up the hem of her rich gown and followed her niece. "what were you talking about?" She asked, knowing the answer. Nessa shrugged again and tossed the weeds into the a pile waiting for burning near the shed, "Just thinking about stuff." Sarah looked at her niece again and took her face in her hands, "And why didn't you stay to fight for your man?" Nessa tore herself away form her aunt and started back up the hill, "If I had, you and Elizabeth wouldn't have me for company!" Elizabeth was Nessa's cousin on her father's side, and had come to stay with Aunt Sarah just before Nessa had arrived. Sarah shook her head and hurried to walk beside Vanessa, "Not that I mind, but I just asked a question." Nessa set the pail down on the porch and wiped her hands on her skirt, "I think you know why Auntie. I'd already lost, and I was about to make a fool of myself over something that was already a lost cause."

Elizabeth came out of the house then, a package in her hands, "Nessa, this just came for you." It was a smaller bundle, wrapped in brown paper and tied off with twine. Ness took the package from her cousin and opened it. It was a book, and she'd opened it upside down. Turning it over in her hands, she was surprised to see the title. _The Collection of William Shakespeare's Sonnets. _Opening the cover, Nessa's eyes widened as she read the hand written note inside:

_To a woman whose beauty is worth a thousand words_

_Forever yours, Adam Cartwright_


	2. Adam

Adam Cartwright leaned forward in his saddle and looked at his father, "You think she got it?" Ben grinned and looked at his son, "If she didn't then we've got a lot of explaining to do." Adam threw back his head and laughed, "I'm afraid we've got that to do anyway." Adam instantly sobered,, and watched the grand house off in the distance. After Laura had left him for his cousin, he had a lot of time to think things over, things concerning Vanessa and him, and how he had let something wonderful slip through his fingers. Almost a week afterwards, he'd gone back to the Summerset, intent on rekindling anything that Vanessa may still feel about him. Oh how shocked he had been when he'd learned that she'd given the Summerset to her ranch hand and his new bride.

Solomon had nearly shot him dead when he'd found out who Adam was, but thanks to some fast talking from his wife, Faith, Adam was still healthy and untouched...although he would have welcomed a good fist fight after learning how Vanessa had reacted to his engagement. And he'd thought Vanessa had been done with tears when they'd dealt with Ethan Lamb, but apparently he'd been wrong. But then, Adam had been wrong about a lot of things when Vanessa was concerned. He'd underestimated her strength of will when they'd been held by Ethan...he'd supposed that when she'd returned home that she would return to him with open arms, although that one was a close call. He should have known that the call of her home was stronger than any claim he may have thought that the Ponderosa could have had. He was just hoping to make amends now. Somehow show her that he wasn't a crass and unfeeling as she'd though he was.

That book was only the start. He had a whole treasure trove of gifts he wanted to shower her with, but if she rejected this first one, then it was all shot to hell. The two women that he and his father were watching started back up a small hill behind the house, and he strained his eyes, trying to see if one of them was Vanessa, but the pudgier older woman was blocking his view. They'd crested the hill when a voice cried out for one of them, and there she was. Even dressed in the plain skirt and blouse, she was beautiful. Her hair was loosely braided down her back, and he could just bet himself that there were a few strands wisping about her shoulders. Her hair was a cinnamon brown that showed tints of red and blonde when the sun hit it just right, and he remembered how it used to catch his breath. She normally wore it free and hanging to her small waist...her waist. The thought sent shivers shooting down his spine. When he'd last seen her, she still had the look of a girl untouched, with hips flaring out slightly from a waist that he could wrap his hands around and touch fingertips.

He felt himself heat at the memory of her held to him against the corral railings...It had been the night that Ethan Lamb had finally died, and taken all her nightmares with her. She'd gone outside the main house to wait for the doctor, and he'd gone to her. He'd found her crying over her slain horse, and he'd kissed her for the first time in all the twenty six years that he'd known her. Kissed her...Adam shook his head to focus on what was happening across the way. The newcomer had handed Vanessa a small object, and Vanessa tore into it. Adam glanced at his father, and nodded, "She's got it!" Ben smirked and turned his horse around. When his son had proposed this little trip, at first Ben at had been against it. "It's foolishness!" he'd thundered, "She's given you up, can't you just accept that?" Adam had shaken his head, "Pa, you didn't see their faces when I'd told them who I was. Damn it! Solomon nearly blasted my head off with that shotgun of his!" He'd blustered a little more, then stopped and Ben had watched all the sir exit his sons sails, "Pa...I've cut her deep. She's been hurt so often by other people, I can't live with thinking that I've added to any pain she still carries." Adam had turned to him, arms folded protectively across his chest, "When she heard about Laura and me it nearly killed her..."

Ben had nodded, "And now that you're free, you want to show her that you love her still?" Adam's voice had failed him, so Ben spoke instead, "You've always loved her, haven't you?" Adam stared at the floor, ashamed that his innermost thoughts could be read so easily. Ben chuckled, "I'll just bet." Adam's head had snapped up then and his eyes glowed dangerously, "Yes, I've loved her...for how long I don't think I'll ever know." Ben chuckled again and put a hand on his sons shoulder, "I'm going with you. Knowing how you two get along, instead of letting her know how you feel you're likely to rip her head off." Adam had shaken his head, as he had just moments ago. Ben knew that look, it was one his son had worn many times while he'd been growing up, being tormented by the child Vanessa Warrick had been. Ben had to admit that Vanessa had grown into a beautiful woman, and he couldn't blame his son for trying just one last time to reclaim her.

They rode away from the house, but Adam's mind wasn't on the ride away. Three days from now, Nessa's aunt was throwing a grand ball in one of the church halls around town, a masked ball. Adam had all intentions of surprising Nessa, and then claiming every dance on her card that evening. It chafed, but he would have to wait until then to hold her again in his arms...and maybe get her to give him on of those earth shaking kisses of hers.

Vanessa looked at her aunt in shock, "look at this." she whispered, showing the inscription to her. Sarah took the book, and smiled broadly, "Well then, I should think that he's still thinking of you." Vanessa shot her a look and shook her head, "I don't want him thinking about me..." she trailed off as Elizabeth let out a cry. "What? Are you crazy? Oh Vanessa, you have no idea what you're throwing away!" She put her hands on her hips and stared at her cousin, "It was Adam Cartwright that brought that book to you in the first place, and I must say...." Vanessa's eyes widened, "He's here? In New Orleans?" Elizabeth looked real nervous, wringing her hands and walking backwards into the house, "Well...um, that's what he said his name was." Vanessa stalked closer to her, reaching out to grab her shoulders, "He was in the house?" Elizabeth's eyes closed and she stopped moving, "No. I didn't let him inside, he just stood outside and waited for me to take the blasted package." She turned her face away, ashamed for swearing. Vanessa relaxed and looked at the book in her hands. Only Adam would have known the exact book that would send her reeling like this, and only Adam would be bold enough to deliver it in person...sort of. Taking a deep breath she looked back at her aunt, "He's here fro that ball your throwing, if I know him...and you had to make it a masked affair!" Vanessa grabbed her skirts in her other hand and marched into the house, furious with the world...but why?


	3. The Ball

As the open carriage pulled up to the church hall, Vanessa's pale face stared up the grand entrance stairs. It was the way of all the important buildings in New Orleans, there were stairs that led up to the main door, while inside another shorter set of steps opened into a main room. It was that second entrance that made her nervous, and that second entrance that she knew would bring her new world crashing into her old one. Adam was here...she could feel it in the air.

Adam waited, dressed in his best and masked to hide his entire face, his father was across the room, so as not to attract too much attention to themselves. Ben was speaking with several other community leaders about something, and let out a soft laugh every once in a while. But it wasn't his father that had his attention, Adam's eyes were glued to the stairs leading to the dance floor. Sarah Governs and her breathtaking niece had yet to arrive.

There was a flurry of activity atop the stairs, and then someone appeared at the top of them, and announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, your hostess for this evening!" Two women appeared behind him, each wearing a variation of the same cut of dress. It was a silhouette that Adam recognized as becoming popular amongst the ladies, an off the shoulder sleeveless cut that tightened around their waists, emphasizing their trim waists. The skirts were voluminous, and each rustle could be heard as the girls stepped aside as another woman, more obviously the hostess, came into view. She wore a maroon gown that was a bit more stately than her nieces attire, and more fitting someone of her age. Sarah Governs raised her hands to her guests and said grandly, "Enjoy!" The band at the end of the hall struck up a fast number and couples flooded the floor.

Adam watched the first girls descend the stairs and smile broadly at different guests as they passed. The one at the right went towards a small knit of people, quickly disappearing form his line of sight, but the other...the other had Vanessa's hair. She was slowly making her way to the snack table, and took up a small glass of punch. He watched her take a sip, then turn herself back around to watch the dancers. Another woman came up to her, and said something, and Adam watched the first girl smile.

It was Vanessa's smile alright. He'd know that curl of her lips anywhere, even from across the room.

Vanessa turned to look at the girl standing beside her, and laughed, "Jenna, I have no intentions of anything for tonight." she said. The poor woman had suggested that Vanessa pursue her current beau, Ranger Kirkpatrick. He was a widowed father of a young boy, Matthew. His wife had passed away about three years ago from an illness no one could explain, but Vanessa had a tugging feeling that she would have been able to help if she'd been here. Jenna Marcus looked pointedly at Vanessa, "Nessa, sweetheart, admit it. You like him more than you let on." Vanessa glanced to where her cousin was schmoozing with the very man they were discussing. He was taller than Adam by only a few inches, with a thick mop of sandy brown hair and the most delicious brown eyes that Vanessa had seen in years. He was built like a sailor, with thick thighs and calves, and powerful arms and shoulders that reminded her of the cowboys she used to work with back on the Summerset, but that mattered little to Vanessa. He was a good man that cared deeply for his little four year old boy, she could see it in his face whenever he talked about him.

They had been courting on and off for the last year, ever since they'd first met in one of the many bookstores along the southern boardwalks. She had been about to pay for her purchase when he'd slid the money in front of her hand. "I'll cover it." she'd looked up at him, into those puppy brown eyes and was surprised to find herself talking to him. He was a delightful conversationalist that had captured her imagination, and reminded her of Adam.

Adam Cartwright...the devil was in this room, she could feel it in the air. Adam carried a way about himself, an aura that made others take notice. She glanced around the room one more time, but with the years that had passed and the fact that most people on the floor were masked, it was hopeless. But not for Adam.

He smiled to himself, and swallowed thickly, it was now or go home without her.


	4. They Meet

Jenna Marcus glanced over Vanessa's shoulder and gasped, "Don't look now, but you've got a tall, dark and handsome stranger walking toward you." Jenna winked at the older girl and moved away carefully. Vanessa swallowed the last of her punch and wiped her mouth carefully. While she was setting her glass down, the man spoke, "Hello." She smiled, "Hi." she was shy?! Vanessa straightened her shoulders and turned to face the mask. His face was completely covered by a black mask that had silver leaves and vines engraved around his eyes...his eyes. They were a very disturbing shade of hazel...no slate that she'd seen in a long time. Shrugging it off, she had a distinct feeling that Adam would be brazen enough to walk in without his face covered.

Adam stared down at the woman in front of him and fought not to smile too brightly. Either she didn't recognize him, or she did and was playing at some game. "Would you care to dance?" He offered his hand and waited.

Vanessa glanced up at him, then took his hand, "I don't see why not." As he lead her onto the dance floor, she caught sight of a larger man standing off to the side of the room, but before she could get a good look at him, her dance partner twirled her under his arm and she was facing him. His hands led her into the waltz , and the size of the room went from several dozen couples to the two of them.

Adam let her simmer for a moment before he spoke, "I hear your aunt was the one that pulled this all together." Vanessa nodded and stared up at him, "Yes...wait. How did you know who I was?" He grinned, tightened his grip on her and spun her a little faster. Her thoughts flew out the window, it took all her concentration to focus on not stepping on his feet as he twirled them to the veranda. Once they were alone, he stopped moving and let her catch her breath.

She stepped away from him and put a hand over her heart, "W—Why did you come out here?" He leaned against the railing and folded his arms, watching her, "There's a full moon out tonight." Vanessa took a deep breath and glanced behind them into the ballroom, "I hadn't noticed..." she turned back to face him, "You didn't answer my question." He chuckled and she moved to stand next to him, bracing herself against the rail on her arms. Adam looked over his shoulder at her, and raised an eyebrow, although he knew she wouldn't be able to see it. "No I didn't."

Vanessa looked at him expectantly, "Well?" Adam drew a breath, then started, "I've known you for a long time...Vanessa Warrick." The way his voice caressed her name, she took a moment to process what he'd said. No one had spoken to her that way since... "Adam?!" she walked backwards quickly, her face a mix of shock and horror... "I knew it!" she hissed and quickly stepped up to him and pushed hard against his chest, "I KNEW it! Adam Cartwright, what in all heaven makes you think you can just waltz with me and...." he grabbed her up to him and kissed her. She broke I quickly and pushed hard against his chest, "You....let...me...go!" He released his grip, then caught her as she stumbled backwards. She almost screamed when he pulled her to him again and kissed her...again.

Vanessa didn't know what to think, but she knew that she couldn't let him keep doing this. Pushing him away again, she caught her breath and took a careful step away from him. "I shouldn't have let you do that. I shouldn't even be out here with you...alone. Adam what are you thinking?" she sighed and put a hand on her forehead, "I can't believe I'm having this conversation with you...here, in New Orleans. The one place I thought I could get away from anyone named Cartwright!" She could feel tears building behind her eyes and she knew she couldn't do that. Closing her eyes, she turned away and took a deep breath, "Adam, please...don't do anymore." she turned around to look at him, "Go home...go home to the Ponderosa...and stay there!" she was about to storm away from him, down the flight of stairs that led to a small garden path.

Before she was too far out, Adam called out to her, "Vanessa, wait!" he ripped the mask of and sped down the steps to her, "Vanessa. I came here to apologize...about the way things happened at the Summerset last year." Vanessa rolled her eyes and put her hands on her hips, "Fine, then apologize. I won't accept it!" she spun on her heel and was about to continue on her way, but he grabbed her arm. "Vanessa..." He checked his voice, and glanced back at the hall behind them, "Just hear me out...please?" She turned back to him and crossed her arms, "you have two minutes, Adam Cartwright. I suggest you use them wisely." Adam nodded and rubbed his hands together, now that he had her here he didn't know where to start. She was waiting for something, and he nodded again, "Alright, but let's go sit down. I really don't think you want to have someone overhear this." She shook her head, "No Adam. You'll say your piece here and now."

What she didn't want to admit was how her lips still burned from where he'd kissed her, or how her body ached to be held against him again...or how she feared that she wouldn't be able to contain herself if they moved anywhere out of sight of the house. The truth of the matter was

She still loved him. As much, or maybe...just maybe even more than she had two years ago when they'd first decided to get married. How her heart hurt to think of that day when she'd left...when he'd come to the Summerset to fetch her 'home'...when she'd learned that he loved another woman...that she could never be his, as her mother had always wanted. As Adam spoke, her mind wandered through the forest of feelings she had about this man.

This man that could still make her flush.


	5. The Results

Adam...Ranger....Adam...Ranger...Adam....Ranger...Adam...Ranger...Adam..

Vanessa sat up in a cold sweat, the nightmare she was having too intense to deal with anymore. Her nightgown cling to her shaking body as she threw off the quilts and went to the inset window. Pulling her knees to her chest, she looked out the window to the lazy creek below her aunts property. She knew that she was facing west, and that a little more to the north than where she was looking was the Ponderosa...well, past the miles of open prairie and sky, but it was there. She sighed and leaned her head back against the wall.

What was she going to do?

Adam crossed his hands behind his head and stared up at the dark ceiling. His father was asleep on the bed across the room, snoring peacefully. It wasn't enough to keep him awake, but he was glad it was there. Something to blame his restlessness on, although he knew what was the real reason. He'd seen her tonight as he'd always seen her, a beautiful princess in a fairy tale, waiting for her knight in shining armor to come rescue her. He just hoped he could be that knight for her.

If only she knew what he did about this Ranger...

Vanessa closed her eyes, and tried not to focus on anything, but it was proving to be rather difficult. Her mind wandered, and soon she was asleep again...

_A breeze played with her hair as she waited. She was leaning out of the window, watching the small lane that lead to the house. She had lost count of how long she had been up here, but she knew she wanted out...now! There were horse hooves on the cobbles and she put a hand up to shade her eyes from the blazing sunlight. The man on the horse below her sat tall in the saddle, his hat low, covering his face. She couldn't get a clear look at him when the door behind her banged open and someone grabbed her waist. "Get away from there." came a gruff voice, and she turned in the arms holding her to come face to face with her father. "Father?" she whispered, thoroughly confused. He smiled at her, his sad little smile that meant he couldn't do anything. "Yes, my little one, it's me..." His eyes moved to the window and the sounds that she could hear coming from below. She turned back to the window and saw that now two men were standing, waiting for her to do something. Nicholas Warrick stood next to her, and leaned against the casement, "Well, which will it be?" Vanessa looked at him surprised, "What? Why do I have to choose?" Nicholas took a deep breath, "Nessa my love, you know you can't go on like this. Adam loved you first, came back for you...twice, I might add, and you know that you feel something for him. No matter how you try to hide it, you love Adam. You always have, form that first night on the Ponderosa when the horses were spooked." he grinned at her, "My little one, you've got such a gift. Your mother taught you so much, she wouldn't want you to waste away here in New Orleans!" The man on the right below her raised his head, and she could finally see that it was Adam. His eyes were soft and inviting, his face lit by a smile...that smile he only gave to her. At least she liked to think so. Then the other man moved, and she saw that it was Ranger, his small son seated on the horse behind him. "I see him too, Nessa. But is he really what you want?" Vanessa swallowed, and closed her eyes. "I don't know father." She opened her eyes and looked back at the men watching her. Ranger was smiling broadly and waving to her, "Vanessa! Vanessa come down here! Matthew and I had a picnic planned..." Adam interrupted, "Nessa, let's go for a ride." Vanessa turned to her father, "I don't know if I can choose." Nicholas put his hands around his daughters face, "Oh, Nessa. Do yourself a favor..... Nessa, Nessa,"_

"Nessa! Nessa! Nessa!" Elizabeth shouted at her cousin, shaking her shoulders violently. She'd heard Vanessa cry out a while ago and had found her seated on the window bench crying her eyes out. Vanessa finally woke, her face wet from crying. "Where...Liz! What are you..." she pushed her away and stood, "Liz what are you doing here?" Elizabeth shook her head and tightened her robe around her waist, "Nessa, I heard you shout in your sleep and I thought that you were having a nightmare." Nessa ran her fingers through her unbound hair and blinked rapidly. "I was...I think." Elizabeth blew out her breath, "You want to talk about it?" Vanessa shook her head and drew a breath, "No....I want to be alone." Elizabeth nodded and walked towards the door, "Are you sure?" she paused by the door and looked back at her cousin, "Yes, Elizabeth. Leave me alone." She heard the door close and dropped her head.

Adam smiled to himself, and turned over in his sleep... _He and Vanessa were back on the Ponderosa, she was sitting in front of him as they galloped across the ranch. Her hair was loose and flying back across his chest. She was leaning back against him, one arm wrapped around his waist to hold him close .He reined Sport in on one of the bluffs overlooking the lake, and felt her take a deep breath. "Oh, Adam. It's beautiful!" He dismounted and helped her down. Her hands were on his shoulders, and as he lowered her, she let her body brush against his. Once her feet were on the ground, they stayed still for another full minute, nothing but the sounds of the birds overhead and Sports steady breathing. Her face was turned to him, and he could see that teasing glint she got whenever she was thinking too much. "What?" he asked, tightening his grip on her waist. They'd announced their engagement only a few days ago, and now they were finally alone. She giggled like a young girl, and tried to pull away but he wouldn't let her, "Adam...Adam, let me go!"_

_The scene changed and they were back in New Orleans, outside the dance hall. Her face wasn't loving anymore and it hurt him. But no more than that look in her eyes, a terrible mix of love and pain. Pain that he'd put there by not acting the way she'd wanted. She'd come back to Virginia City to beg his forgiveness, and instead she'd found him loving another woman. "Nessa..." he whispered, bringing a hand up to her cheek, "Nessa...Wait!" She was running away from him, and into the shadowy arms of another man. "Vanessa! I love you..."_ Adam sat up in bed and was breathing heavy. His father shifted in his sleep, but otherwise stayed that way. Adam shook his head and slid out of bed, grateful that he'd left his pants on. He went to the window, braced his arm against the casement and put his hand on his hip. The hotel wasn't far from Vanessa's aunts house, and there was a light on upstairs.


	6. The Cave

_**Authors Note:**__ For those who haven't checked my profile, I recommend listening to The Dumbing Down of Love while you read this chapter. It takes about two playthroughs to get to the end of it, but I like the effect._

Vanessa shook her head and ran a hand through her hair. She needed to clear her head, but there wasn't much she could do about it right now...or could she? The creek behind her aunts house ran over a small cliff, not very tall, but it came out of the foothills and had carved out a little cave, well little in comparison to those back home. But it was tall enough to stand in, and it had a hot spring pool. She'd discovered it within a few weeks of her being here, and had claimed it as her own private spot. Pulling her soaked nightgown off, she grabbed the shorter chemise she saved for occasions like this and pulled it over her head. Vanessa then grabbed her robe, a spare towel and turned out her light; carefully making her way down the hall. Her room was at the back of the house, but to even get to the servants stairs she had to pass not only Elizabeth's room, but her aunts as well. Then there was the third step from the bottom, it squeaked horribly when someone stepped on the center.

Once outside, she closed her eyes and took a full breath, loving the way the cool night air filled her lungs. It was crisp and clean, the perfect ending to a horrible night. She opened her eyes, and stared up at the stars. When she was really young, her mother had told her that all those that had gone before were in the stars. After her mother's death, it had taken her a long time to dare looking at them again. "I miss you Momma. What I wouldn't give to have you here for this!" she whispered, taking another breath. Momma would know exactly what she should do...who she should choose. Shaking her head, she checked the lantern on the porch for oil. It had enough to last for the next three hours if she worked things right. Lighting it carefully, she lowered the wick and moved down the hill.

Adam was still looking out his window when he saw the light in the window go out, and seconds later another light appear in the yard. And it was moving! Straining his eyes, he could just make out a figure carrying a lantern...Nessa? What was Vanessa doing out at this hour...and in a house robe? He shook his head and turned around and grabbed up his shirt and boots. Wherever she was going, he was going to follow...after all, someone had to keep her safe.

Vanessa slipped past the waterfall, well, it wasn't really even a waterfall as much as water falling from a height taller than her head, and crept into the larger opening of the cave behind the water. There were piles of rocks and stalagmites all around her, but she only needed to go about a hundred feet...and there. She lifted the lantern higher, and she could see the five or six pools that formed the hot spring. There was a small cool water stream that flowed through the cave and mixed with the hot water to create a few more tolerable pools. The one on the far right was the biggest, she could swim across it easily, but the only drawback was that near the far end it got pretty deep. She set the lantern down on a flat rock near the pool and shrugged out of her robe. Her short chemise barely covered her rump, but she was alone wasn't she? She glanced around, just to be sure, then slipped into the water.

Oh it felt good to be like this, alone and able to think things through without interruption. It reminded her of the days before her mother's death when Vanessa would sit at her piano while Jennifer sang along. She rolled in the water, letting her hair get soaked then dived to the bottom. The water was soothing and silent, just like she wanted to be. Her lungs began to burn and she pushed off the bottom to erupt from the surface. Throwing her head back, she let the water ripple down her face and she again sank to her toes. The water came up to just below her jaw, but she didn't care. She kicked her legs lightly and laid back to float on the water.

Adam had followed her until she disappeared behind the waterfall, then waited as the light got softer. He carefully pulled himself through the small opening allowed by the water. He stood still for a moment, letting his eyes adjust to the dim light the lantern gave off. She was only about a hundred feet ahead of him, but when she set the lantern down, he got a full show. She removed her robe, revealing the creamiest pair of legs that Adam had seen in a long time. The chemise she wore was barely long enough to be considered decent, but then again...she thought she was alone. She turned her head, to be sure she was alone, and Adam found that he was flattening himself against the wall to not be seen. Why was he doing that? He watched her dive beneath the surface, but before he could do anything, she reemerged, flinging her hair back and staring at the ceiling. She brought her legs up to begin to float, and that was his cue. He tried to get closer, but stepped on a loose rock, and the noise echoed around the semi-quiet room.

Vanessa moved to standing as soon as she heard the echo, and wrapped her arms around herself protectively. She strained her eyes, trying to see past the lantern beside the water, but it was almost impossible. "Who's there?" she called out, her voice sounded scared. She swallowed, and tried again, "Hello?" There were footsteps on the ground, and soon she could see Adam standing over the lantern. His shirt was open, revealing the defined muscles of his chest and abdomen. The thick dark dust of his hair glistened in the Louisiana heat, and and she could just make out the powerful muscles of his thighs. "Oh...it's you." she said, her voice catching in her throat as she looked at him. He smirked, "I didn't mean to spy on you..." she raised an eyebrow at him, doubtful, but he ignored it. "It's rather warm out tonight...mind if I join you?"

Vanessa's eyes widened, and she honestly thought about it. Did she want the reason for her wanting escape to invade that escape?

Adam watched a thousand emotions battle across her face; fear, worry, dread, then something he hadn't thought he'd see, want. She actually wanted him to join her! But would she admit it?

Vanessa swallowed and looked away from him. He could read too much in her eyes, it was the drawback of having spent so much time together as children. She was afraid to say yes, worried that she would say yes, and dreading that she wanted to say yes. She wanted to say yes! God damn her to the furthest level of hell, she wanted _him._ Taking a careful breath, she pushed away from the wall sheltering her figure, and looked back up at him. "Jump in if you want..." She swam back to the far ledge and found the smaller stones she'd stacked here a while ago. There was another pool, similar to this one, only a little smaller and warmer. She'd enlisted the help of one of one of the servants and had placed several larger smoother rocks around the outer edge to create a seating spot. She was about to climb out when a thought hit her.

She was only in a short chemise...and it was now wet. She bit her lip and looked back at him, "I'm not getting out am I?" Adam grinned and raised an eyebrow at her. "No, I guess not." He peeled off his shirt and she turned her back to him, not wanting him to see the flush that came to her face. Not that she hadn't seen men shirtless before, she grew up on a working ranch for gods sake!, but this was different somehow. This...._this was Adam._ He sat down and pulled of his boots, stretching his bare toes. He stood to drop his pants when he glanced over at her, her back turned to him and head bowed to stare into the water. He could just make out the shimmer of her thighs as they moved back and forth to keep her afloat. His jeans hit the stones with a soft thud, and he sat on the edge of the pool letting his legs drop into the water. When Vanessa didn't move, he smirked and let the rest of his body slip into the pool. She raised her head as she heard the lap of the waves against the stones, and turned around, keeping her chin low to the water. "Alright, you're in. Now what?" Adam raised an eyebrow at her and stepped forward, testing the depth of the water. It came to about the middle of his chest when it suddenly dropped and hit his chin. Vanessa chuckled at him, "I suppose I should have warned you." He looked back at her, "You might have. But then again, I would have been surprised if you had." Vanessa raised her eyebrows and shook her head.

She tired to move around him, to get back to the shallower water, but his arm came out to catch her around her waist. She gasped as he clutched the fabric into a ball and pulled her to him, "I missed you Nessa." She looked away, "I meant what I said last night." She sighed, and looked at him, "I know, Adam. I'd be a fool not too. I've known you long enough to know that you wouldn't lie to me...not about us." the look in his eyes changed, "Nessa, you once told me that you loved me." She looked up into his face, her own eyes hard to read, "Do you still?" Vanessa squirmed under his hard scrutiny, "Why does it matter?" His arm tightened around her, crushing her to him. His other arm came around and helped her stay afloat as he stepped into the deeper parts, careful to keep her head above the water. She put her hands on his shoulders, her eyes widening, "Adam!" She tried unsuccessfully to get him to let her go, but he held her tight. "It matters to me, and that used to be enough for you." Vanessa closed her eyes, "Yes. Your good opinion used to mean the world to me, but now I'm not so sure." she leaned her head against his shoulder, making his back up a bit. He took a deep breath, trying so hard to ignore the feel of her against him, "Well?" he prompted, making her raise her face to look at him again, "Do you still love me?"

She bit her lip, and stared into those all knowing eyes of his. Did she still love him?

She knew her heart still raced at the thought of him, it was racing now as he held her so close, his face only inches from her own. Her body warmed in a way that she couldn't think she could describe when he was close, and she didn't want to think about how her mind had been wandering to those long ago days on the Ponderosa. When he'd come for her on the Summerset, how handsome he'd looked on Sport then, tall in the saddle and riding as though he already owned the ranch. She knew that ever since she'd learned he was in New Orleans she'd been anxious to see him, jumping at each knock on the door, and disappointed when it wasn't him. She looked away from him, gnawing on her lower lip, and panicking. Did she still love him?

He brought a hand up to her chin and made her look at him, into that piercing gaze of his that reached into her very soul. Her soul...as her mind considered _that,_ she realized that if she denied him, she was likely to lose her soul. Adam represented everything she really loved in life. Open land, tree covered mountains and crystal clear lakes. The man was as rugged as the countryside he had worked with the very hands that held her so lovingly. This man knew what it meant to live and die by the land...this man...Adam...

She knew that if she admitted anything, he could destroy her with a glance, a single word. But last night...what he'd said. He was waiting so patiently for her answer. Did she still love him?

She took a deep breath, her mind made up, "I never stopped."


	7. Uhoh

Fire poured through Adam's body when she said it, and he couldn't stop himself from dropping his mouth over hers and kissing her passionately. He brought his arm around her waist, the other dropping around her shoulders. Her own hands moved on him, one creeping behind his head to pull his closer while the other sneaked around his torso. His tongue teased her lips apart, tasting the sweetness of her mouth. Their tongues danced around each other, stroking, teasing, luring the other.

Adam backpedaled quickly and turned them around so that her back was against the stone. When her feet touched ground, he drew back to let her breathe. Her eyes were closed as she leaned her head back against the ledge, exposing her neck to him. He swallowed hard and tried to speak, but his voice didn't sound right, "Nessa..." She opened her eyes and looked at him, "Yes?" She was breathing heavily, her eyes a hazy blue. "Nessa, you have to stop me." her brow wrinkled and she stood straighter, pulling away from him. "What?" His chest rose and fell as he thought about it, "Nessa, if you don't stop me, I'm going do something that we might regret." Vanessa looked away, and put a hand to her throat. He was right, they should stop this now. But she didn't want it to stop, she loved him. Wanted more of him. She turned back to him and grabbed his shoulders, raking her fingers down his chest and stomach, stopping just below his navel and worked one hand back up. She felt him shiver as she inched closer to him and brought her hand around his neck, the other gripped his hip. Pulling him down to her, she let her teeth scrape the skin of his neck. His breath came quicker and he pushed her away from him.

Adam braced hims arms on the stones on either side of her, and hung his head. "Nessa, you'd better get out of this pool...NOW!" She didn't move. "Vanessa...I'm serious. If you don't get out of this pool..." She put a hand over his mouth, "I'm not leaving Adam." he closed his eyes and stepped away from her, "Vanessa, you don't know what you're saying. If you stay, I can't promise that you'll leave this cave the same way..." she folded her arms across her chest and stared at him, "I didn't ask you in here, remember?" He stopped, and opened his eyes to stare at her, "Nor did I ask you to New Orleans, or back to the Summerset to find out where I was, or to the Summerset to begin this whole thing." She moved forward, careful to not slip in the mud beneath her toes, "But, I did let you into this pool..." she reached out to him and grabbed his arm, "And I am old enough to know what I'm saying." She smirked, "Although, I don't remember really saying anything other than that I've never stopped loving you." She let it sink in, then moved to stand in front of him, "But, Adam Cartwright, I am asking you...do you love me?" Adam growled and wrapped his arms around her again, "I told you last night, Nessa. I've always loved you, and it wasn't until you were gone that I realized how much." She traced a finger across his lips, "And you think that by pushing me away you're saving me from something? From you?" Adam lowered his forehead against hers and blew out his breath, "Nessa...don't ask me that. I won't be the one to destroy your reputation." Vanessa chuckled, "What reputation, Adam? You heard what the people back home called me. Daughter of a witch, the bride of the devil..." His grip on her waist tightened angrily. "You know full well that's not what you are, and I'll have words with any man who says otherwise." She couldn't help but smile at him, and ran her hands up his arms to his shoulders, "I know, Adam. You proved a long time ago that you wouldn't do anything to hurt me." His eyes shut down at that comment, "Nessa...if we did this, I would hurt you." She smiled gently, and put a hand on his cheek, "Adam...you really think you could?" his eyes told her everything, and it made her ache. Throwing caution to the wind, she used his own arms as leverage to lift herself up and wrap her legs around his waist, "Adam, my love, you won't hurt me...well," now that she was were she was, she could tell that he very well might, "You might. But this is my choice. My heart's been yours ever since we were children, and I've been yours to claim for a long time." she lowered her lips to his and kissed him gently, "I've made my decision, Adam. What about you?"

She was so soft, so willing...she was in love with him. She wanted him, he could smell it. And when she kissed him, the last shred of his resolve fled. He brought a hand to her neck, and let a thumb caress the spot where her pulse was, "Are you absolutely certain, Nessa. I don't want this to be another reason for..." she shut him up by planting her mouth on his, hot and demanding. Her hands were in his hair, running down his shoulders, up his arms and scratching down his chest. He held her to him with one arm as his other slid easily up her back and tugged gently on her hair, opening her mouth more, taking it in a gentle grip and holding it there. He ran his fingers through the wet strands, their silky texture making his skin tingle. She locked her ankles behind his rump, her thighs tightening as she did so, making him groan into their kiss. "Nessa...Nessa." He broke the kiss and left a trail of kisses down her cheek to her neck. Vanessa let her head fall back, gasping and shivering at what he was doing to her, "Adam..." she whispered, and he pulled back instantly, his eyes hazy with desire, "Just say the word, Nessa, and I'll stop..." he knew it was a lie as soon as the words left his mouth. He couldn't stop now, not when she like this. She brought her face to his, and loosened her legs from his torso, "Adam, if you dare stop, _then I will hate you."_ She was still holding him, her feet searching for the bottom. He swept her up in his arms and purposefully walked to the edge of the pool. Lifting her out of the water, he set her on the warm stones and hefted himself out as well. She swallowed at the sight of him, maybe she'd spoken too soon about him not hurting her. Her eyes roved over him, not wanting to be caught staring. The water dripped from the creases in his muscles and in the flicker of the lantern, he looked like a bronze Adonis. Her breath caught in her throat when she met his eyes.

He was kneeling over her now, his eyes probing, looking for the slightest hint that she wanted him to stop. Her mouth was open slightly as she tried to catch her breath, but other then that, there was no change. The chemise she wore was soaked, and hiding nothing from his questing eyes as he devoured her with his gaze. The gentle slope of her neck, the rise and fall of her breasts, her slim waist and pale thighs. God she was beautiful, and she deserved better than this for her first time. "Nessa," he croaked, looking back into her eyes, "We shouldn't...you deserve..." she interrupted him, sitting up quickly and taking his face in her hands, "What I deserve and what I want have always been two different things... until you." she leaned in again and caught his mouth, pulling him back onto the floor insistently. He moved over her, bracing himself above her with his elbows, kissing her mouth, cheeks, neck and shoulders. Vanessa was moaning with each contact, and whimpering as he pulled away, but Adam wanted to savor this. Slowly he crawled lower over her body, his mouth investigating everything. When he got to her breasts, he could tell she wanted him, her nipples were hard and begging for his lips.

Vanessa gasped in pleasure as his mouth caught her left then right nipple, suckling, teasing, tormenting. She brought a hand to his head and cupped the back of his neck, not wanting him to stop. It was getting so much harder to breathe, she didn't want this to stop. All she wanted was to keep feeling this ecstasy that Adam was giving her. Oh, how she loved this man...she'd been a fool for leaving when she had. If she hadn't then perhaps they wouldn't be doing this here, in a hot spring cave, but in his bed back on the Ponderosa. Then again, anything that they might have done was past...and this, now, was all that mattered. He was moving again, and it was all that Vanessa could do not to clench her legs together. His hands were stroking the skin of her inner thighs, slowly working their way closer to her center. Her breath was ragged and forced, "What are you..." she was about to ask when his hand brushed against her, and her head fell back and she moaned loudly.

Adam smiled and continued to tease her for another moment before climbing back above her, his undergarments now discarded below his feet. As he let his weight settle onto her, he looked into her eyes. His manhood waited just outside her entrance, her own fluids coating him in her anticipation. He swallowed thickly, and whispered, "Nessa, if you want me to..." She smiled that wonderful smile of hers and said, "I don't want you _to..._I just _want_ you." He growled low in his throat and thrust into her in one swift stroke. Vanessa's head fell back, and she gasped his name, "Adam...oh, Adam." he moved against her, slowly at first, but when she matched his tempo he couldn't hold back anymore. His hips ground against her, he buried his mouth in the skin of her neck and groaned. Vanessa's hands gripped his backside, pulling him closer, tighter, deeper. She felt the fires from before building in her gut, spiraling tighter and tighter until in one fell swoop they released and she felt as though she herself had exploded. Her voice was gone and all she could do was moan low as her body shook beneath his moving frame. A few seconds later Adam pulled his head back and kissed her ferociously, burying himself within her hot folds and letting out a yell of his own. He collapsed on top of her, careful not to crush her. He took a few slow breaths, coming down from the high, and rolled to her side, keeping his arm across her belly as she tried to collect herself. "Adam I..." He pulled her close to him, keeping her warm against his body, "I didn't hurt you did I?" she wanted to giggle, he was so adorable, so afraid that he had done something wrong. She shook her head instead and snuggled closer to him, "No." he smiled into her hair, "Good...then you wouldn't mind if I did this?" he lowered his mouth to her ear, and they started all over again.


	8. The Next Morning

They lay in the darkness of the cave for a few moments more before they separated and gathered up their discarded clothing. The lantern had gone out about two hours ago, but they hadn't really noticed. They'd been too involved with discovering the others bodies to really worry about it, but now the pre-dawn light was creeping into their sanctuary, and it made them hurry. Nessa threw on her robe and was putting the towel between her hair and her shoulders when Adam grabbed her waist and pulled her to him. He lowered his mouth to her ear, wrapping his arms around her middle in an intimate hug, "No regrets?" She smiled and pressed against him, relishing his response, "I could never regret you." She kissed him gently, then stepped out of his reach and left the cave. As she moved she knew she would be sore most of the day, but it didn't feel any worse than being in the saddle all day for a round – up. She'd made do about that before, and she'd do it again.

Adam waited until her footsteps disappeared from the creek, then another minute before leaving the cave himself. His mind was racing with ideas about how to see her again today..and then it hit him. He had a small gift that he wanted to give her, something to accompany the book he'd already given her. He smiled as he hopped over the fence separating the Governs' property from the road, and let his hand drop to where his gun should be. It wasn't until he realized that he hadn't taken it into the cave with him that he wished he had. It was just a feeling, but he'd yet to be led astray by his instincts.

He could have sworn he was being watched.

Vanessa crept back into her room and shut the door as gently as she could. It hadn't been hard to explain her sudden appearance in the kitchen, after all her hair was still sopping wet and the towel helped her little story about going down to wash up for the day. The maids had hassled her for leaving while it was still dark, but she'd shrugged it off. Now she was just grateful that she wouldn't have to side step any pestering from her aunt or cousin. She leaned against the door and put a hand over her heart, breathing deeply. 'What did you just do?!' she demanded of herself. 'you never give in to impulses, and admit it, _that_ was an impulse!' Then her mind continued to think, something she didn't want it to do right now, 'what if you get pregnant?' She swallowed hard as the hand on her heart dropped to her belly, and she closed her eyes, 'Then again...would that be such a bad thing? To be carrying Adam Cartwright's child?' She tried to count the number of times they had...but it was impossible. Each one bled into the other, the whole night was just a fog of kisses, touches and pleasures that she hadn't known existed until now.

She blew out her breath and went to the vanity. Sitting down on the padded stool, she winced and adjusted to be more comfortable. What she really wanted was to crawl under the covers of her bed and relive every moment from the cave. But that would be impossible, even if she could get this riot of hair to obey a hairbrush. It was wet, knotted, matted against her head and she was sure she would find some very small rocks and clumps of mud when she was through. Resigning herself to the task, she picked up her brush and went to work. "Ow." she whimpered, but she didn't regret a thing. A knock came to her door, and she asked who it was. Her aunt opened the door and poked her head inside, "I hear you went for a swim in the hot spring this morning." Vanessa met her eyes in the mirror and nodded, "I did. Do you object?" Sarah shook her head and stepped into the room, closing the door behind her, "I think you might need some help though. Vanessa glanced at her reflection again and smiled ruefully, "I suppose so. Who do you think would help me at this hour?" Sarah shook her head, "You've got your father's wit, you know that?" Vanessa winked at her aunt and handed her the brush.

Adam snuck into the hotel room, and was about to remove his clothing again when his father stirred and spoke, "you've been gone for quite a while. Where were you?" Adam swallowed, thinking fast, "Nowhere in particular." Ben nodded, and swung his legs over the side of the bed, shaking his head to wake up quicker, "Well, the next time you do that, take your gun with you. The last thing I want is to hear about you being dumped in one of the swamps around here for opening that mouth of yours." Adam chuckled to himself, 'Pa, you don't know that half of what trouble my mouth has gotten me into lately.' Ben raised an eyebrow at his son, but ignored the silent response. He knew something else had happened, it was obvious in the way that he walked around the room, preparing for the day. Adam splashed some cold water on his face, and grabbed for the shaving kit the hotel had provided. "What are your plans for today?" Ben asked, nudging his son over so that he could do the same. Adam shrugged, and set the blade to his throat, "I was thinking about heading over to the Governs place. Giving Nessa that bookmark I made." Ben glanced at him in the mirror, "You sure that's wise? After last night and what Vanessa said?" Adam smiled, and wiped his face, now smooth. "I have an odd feeling that Nessa's mind has changed a bit in that department." Ben took a deep breath and shook his head, "I don't know what you're talking about, but if you plan on making a fool out of yourself for her, I'm not going to stand in your way." He pulled a shirt over his shoulders and kept talking, "I was thinking about heading that way myself, mind if I go along?" Adam's reaction was shocking, "NO!" he swallowed quickly at his father's surprised face, "What I mean is...um, I had thought about giving this to her alone..." Ben chuckled and clapped his son on the shoulder, "I think I can arrange that. I hear her aunt is a stickler for propriety, and won't give you a moment alone with her if she can help it." Adam nodded, grateful that his father was willing to help. As they left the hotel, Ben had to ask, "How much longer do you plan on wearing her down?" Adam thought it out; he couldn't just say that he'd already won her, but the again he couldn't just say some large number either. "I'm not sure. This visit might tell me more." Ben nodded. It was a calculated response, but not quite the one he'd been expecting.

Vanessa was sitting in the parlor of her aunts home, her fingers dancing over the keys of the grand piano. There wasn't any music in front of her, but she'd played her mothers lullaby so many times, she didn't need it. As she played the verse, she hummed along, but once the chorus arrived, her voice rang clear through the house:

_I am the voice in the wind and the pouring rain_

_I am the voice of your hunger and pain_

_I am the voice that always is calling you_

_I am the voice, I will remain._

She continued to sing, but quieter as Elizabeth walked into the room, a small book in her hands. "You're in a good mood today." she observed, catching Nessa off guard, "Excuse me?" she asked, continuing to play, now moving on to another piece that she'd written herself. Elizabeth motioned to the piano, "You almost never play that thing, and when you do it's never something that upbeat. Nessa smiled, and looked down at her hands, "I suppose I never had reason to." Elizabeth sat on one of the settees and raised an eyebrow at her, "And what might that be? It can't be that Adam Cartwright. I remember you being rather angry when you found out he was in town." Nessa winked at her cousin, "I know, and I'm sorry about that. Adam and I have a long history, and I forgot that you don't know him as well as I." 'Most definitely not now.' she thought to herself, shifting on the bench and beginning another tune, Fur Elise by Beethoven.

It was a pretty picture, and Sarah hated to ruin it. Nessa had chosen to wear a loose sleeved gown of red satin, the skirt folding and tucking away from her waist and pulling away from the front to show another skirt of white. The neckline was lower than her usual, was of a rolled white fabric, to match the underskirt. The sleeves fell away from her elbows, leaving her hands open. It had taken the two of them a full ten minutes to get the mud and rocks out of Nessa's hair, and when it was done, Sarah had insisted that they put it up. Nessa had allowed her to braid it around her head, but had asked that some be left down around her shoulders. It was a comfort thing, Sarah knew, and had obliged her niece. Now she was wondering if she should have, Nessa was a vision in that red dress. The piano was next to the window, and with the morning sun pouring through the glass, she looked no less the angel. Then there was Elizabeth, almost the complete opposite to Nessa bot in demeanor and appearance; where Nessa had a full thick head of cinnamon hair, Elizabeth's was fair and not quite as thick. Nessa had intense blue eyes that shifted in color between blue, grey, and green depending on her mood, while Elizabeth's were a steady green. While both girls were thin, Nessa looked a bit more willowy and had a confidence built in that came from years of being in charge of a ranch. Elizabeth came from Sarah's sister, and while Nessa had been learning to ride horses and mix herbs to heal various wounds, Elizabeth had been taught how to mend tears in clothing and care for a home. It wasn't that Sarah doubted in Nessa's ability to do so, but ranch life was different than city life...and Sarah feared that Nessa's spirit was being stifled here.

There were noises outside, as though horses were coming up the front lane. She hurried with her doorman to the front hall, and nodded to him to open it as footsteps crested the porch. There were two men standing there, neither of which she recognized. The older was barrel chested and had a weathered look about him. His face was open and honest, but Sarah could see that there was a powerful strong will behind this man. He had the look of a gentleman rancher that wasn't afraid to get his hands dirty, and reminded her of her dear departed brother, Nicholas. The other man was younger, and had a darker complexion, but there was a fierce gentleness to him that Sarah appreciated. They both removed their hats when she appeared, and the older was the first to speak, "Ma'am. My name is Benjamin Cartwright, and this is my son Adam. We were hoping to see your niece, Vanessa Warrick." Sarah eyed them carefully, but confident in her ability to read people, she smiled warmly, "Of course! Please, please, come in!" she stepped aside and waved them inside. Ben came in first, closely followed by his son. "She's in the parlor, here." Sarah led them to the doors, and moved so that she could see their faces as they glanced at the scene.

Sarah had taught her nieces well. She knew they had heard the interchange in the hall, but neither had moved, or even made pretense of showing that they knew they were being watched. Nessa's back was maybe a little straighter, and Elizabeth had set aside her book to stand at the piano, taking advantage of the natural light. Sarah turned her attention back to the male visitors, and watched Adam's reaction. His face went from anxious to adoration as he stared at Nessa. She was the true center of attention, seated in the sunlight as she was, and her face was calm as she played a lullaby that Nicholas would often have sung to her. Ben's face was much the same as his sons, although it had a more fatherly look to it than that of a would be suitor. Suddenly the music stopped, and Sarah knew that was her cue. "Girls, we have visitors." she said, and Elizabeth jumped slightly, turning her head to look at the doorway. Nessa didn't move, just raised her eyes from the piano to the door, her face flushing slightly.

Sarah thought she knew why.

Elizabeth pushed herself away form the piano, her cousin appeared frozen to the bench, "Hello, gentlemen. Please, join us." she motioned to the many settees and chairs around the room, and Ben nodded gratefully. His moving forward startled Adam, who hadn't taken his eyes off from Nessa. Nessa smiled lightly, and finally moved from her spot, walking over to Ben and hugging him tightly. "Uncle Ben, it's so good to see you again!" she exclaimed, and he returned the embrace. "it's good to see you too, Vanessa." she smiled and looked at her feet, "I wish someone had told me you were here." she said, risking a glance over at Adam.

He couldn't make himself move, she was too stunning. The red really set off the highlights in her hair, and had taken his breath away when he'd first seen her. Now, as she moved to a settee with his father, all he could think of was how she had sat in his lap the night before during one particularly passionate moment. "Adam, will you join us?" Sarah asked, touching his arm and breaking his reverie. Adam inhaled sharply and smiled down at the portly woman, "Why not?" he let her lead him to a spot across from Nessa. Not exactly where he wanted to be, but it would work until his father could get the other women out of the room. Vanessa sat next to Ben, acutely aware of Adam's eye on her. Elizabeth was talking with him, but it sounded a little too much like flirting for Vanessa's comfort, and for the second time in her twenty two years, she felt the stab of jealousy where Adam was concerned. She ricked a glance over at him when her aunt caught Ben's attention for a moment, and caught him staring at her. Adam winked at her, and she felt a little foolish. After all that they did last night, hoe could she possibly be jealous? The memory made her flush, and look away quickly, but she was still to slow to escape her aunt's notice.

"Vanessa Nichole Warrick, would you like a moment alone with your suitor?" The comment caught both Adam and Vanessa by surprise and made Sarah chuckle happily. "Aunt Sarah?" Vanessa whispered, not daring to get her hopes up. Sarah smiled knowingly at her niece and rose from her seat, "You really think I haven't noticed the looks you two have been giving each other? It's almost as though you haven't been paying attention to a word any of the rest of us have been saying." just to be a snot, Vanessa looked up at her aunt and said, "What was that? I didn't hear what you said." Elizabeth burst out into a giggling fit and Ben smiled as well. Getting to his feet, he decided to take charge and offered his arm to Sarah, "Well then, should we take a walk?" Sarah took his arm and motioned to Elizabeth, "Come along, Lizzie. I know when we aren't wanted." Elizabeth left the room first, followed closely by Sarah. Ben paused for only a second before he gripped the handle on the door, closing to only a crack when he left. Adam waited for their footsteps to fade before he moved from his seat in the chair opposite her, "You're beautiful." he whispered as he sat down next to her, taking one of her hands in his. He ran his knuckles up the inside of her arm and looked deep into her eyes, "How are you feeling?" She looked away briefly, her cheeks red, then turned back to him, "There's little point in denying that I'm tired, but otherwise I'm fine." He brought his other hand to her cheek and grinned, "Nessa, you are a terrible liar." Then he leaned in and let his lips graze her cheek.

Her arms erupted with gooseflesh and a shiver ran up her spine. "Adam," she began, but he put a finger over her lips, "I have something for you." he pulled an oblong box from his coat pocket and placed it in her hand. She shifted slightly to catch the light, and he edged closer to her, resting his chin on her shoulder. When she opened the lid, she gasped, and put a hand over her mouth, "Oh, Adam.." It was a silver bookmark, hammered out into a gentle swoop, and engraved onto it was a design of leaves and vines, similar to what had been on his mask the night before at the ball, "Adam, I can't possibly..." he chuckled and let his lips brush against her neck, "Oh yes you can. You accepted _me_ didn't you?" She drew a shuddering breath, "Adam..." he brought a hand around her waist and held her to him. "Nessa...marry me. Here, now, in New Orleans. We can go home together to the Ponderosa and be together." She leaned away from him, "You're serious, aren't you." he nodded, and whispered, "After last night, I couldn't live with myself if I knew that...that you..." she raised her eyebrows and pushed herself off the settee, walking to the piano. "So that's it then." he was confused, "What?" she turned on him, her face dark, "You're asking me because of..._that."_ she waved towards the creek and put her hands on her hips, "Out of sense of duty rather than love." her voice got soft as she turned her back to him, and protectively wrapped her arms around her middle.

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, "Now I didn't say that." She spun around, her loose hair fanning out behind her, "Then what did you mean?" Before he could answer, Elizabeth came tearing into the room, her face alight. Vanessa went to her, ignoring Adam completely, "Lizzie, what...?" Elizabeth couldn't hold it back any longer, "It's Mary Wallace. Her maid Laura just came through the gate a a flutter and she's asking for you. She says that Mary's having difficulty and needs your help." She finally took a breath, but Vanessa was already walking down the hall, and out the back door. Elizabeth looked at Adam and hastened to follow her cousin, "Vanessa wait! You know full well that you can't..." Vanessa slammed the back door open, and it cracked against the side of the house. Sarah was trying to calm Laura down when Vanessa emerged, and Laura was having none of it. She picked up her single skirt and raced to Vanessa, "Mis Nessa, it's Ms Mary. She..." Vanessa held up a hand and nodded knowingly, "I heard, Laura. Can you help me?" the young girl bobbed her head excitedly and grabbed the small rooksack that Vanessa kept on the porch cupboard. Elizabeth finally came out of the house and stood next to her aunt, "Vanessa you can't be serious about going there!" Vanessa was ignoring her cousin, hopped the small fence around the herb garden and just set about removing raspberry leaves, and placing them in a small handkerchief. When Laura got to her, she placed the kerchief in the sack and moved through two other plants before answering her cousin, "Do I lok like I'm joking around?" She glanced at her aunt and asked, "I'm going to need that St. John's Wort oil I made last fall, can you get it for me?" Sarah was about to protest, but the look that Vanessa gave her sent her scurrying off into the house.

Elizabeth came to the fence and fretted at her cousin, "Nessa, I'm serious, you can't just head down to the boardwalks without an escort!" Vanessa snorted and raised an eyebrow at her cousin, and before she spoke she whistled loudly, "I've been down there before, and you know that Mary's a good friend of mine. I won't let that butcher deliver this child!" As she spoke, Jupiter exited the barn, tossing his mane and his eyes rolling. He was chased by a stablehand, apparently the man had barely had just enough time to put on the bridle on the beast when Vanessa had called for him. The man was followed by another carrying the saddle but Vanessa waved him off. "Don't worry about it Hank." She glanced at Laura, "You didn't bring the house's pony along did you?" Laura shook her head, no. That caught Vanessa, "You _ran_ the whole way here?" Laura nodded as though she was being chastised, Vanessa shook her head in wonderment, "Definitely won't be needing the saddle now, Hank."

Sarah came back out with the jar in hand, but Adam intercepted her and took the jar from her, "Nessa, I don't like this." she smirked and took the jar from him, "I don't care at the moment." That riled him and he grabbed her arm before as she walked past, "Vanessa." It was meant to come out angry, but came out more of a hiss. She stopped, but nodded to Laura who scurried over to Jupiter's side to have Hank help her onto his back, "Vanessa, you didn't answer my question." Vanessa gave him a crooked grin and glanced back towards the creek and hot spring cave, "I thought I had." she pulled her arm from his grips and went to the fence. Jupiter followed her, and when she stepped up on the rail, she leapt onto his back, bringing her legs astride and whimpering slightly. She grabbed the reins around Laura's frame and turned the horse around to the front walk, "I don't have time for your worrying Adam. I told Mary to call for me only if it was a breech, and I gave my word I would help her." He came up to her and grabbed her calf, "Nessa." She pulled her leg from him, and dug her heels into Jupiter's flanks, making the horse rear back and take off at a gallop.

Ben turned to his hostess, "Where's she going?" Sarah drew a deep breath and looked hard at Adam, "Mary Wallace is one of Madame Maria's ladies."


	9. A Meeting

Vanessa and Laura arrived at Madame Maria's complex estate in a flurry, and Vanessa leapt from Jupiter's back as soon as they got to the main steps. She turned and took the bag of herbs from Laura, then motioned that the stablehand take Jupiter around back. No matter what she tried to do, the great black stallion was too recognizable. If anyone knew the horse, they would know she was here. Not that it was really an issue, but it mattered to Aunt Sarah, so the horse was hidden.

Two male guards, Maria called them Bouncers but Vanessa knew that they were in fact eunuchs, led her up the main staircase. The stairs led to an array of hallways and small waiting rooms, each one belonging to one or two different girls, and Vanessa was led down the one that alone belonged to Mary. The hallway opened up into a smaller sitting room, actually it was a larger room but with all the people inside it felt that much smaller. Vanessa looked around and saw several faces she knew, mostly the girls from the house. Near one of the windows Mary's latest lover, and most likely the father of this child, was talking in hushed tones to..."Ranger?" Vanessa's voice cut through the many conversations around her, and the man she addressed turned to her in surprise.

He stepped away from his conversation and came over to her, "Vanessa, what are you doing here?" She nodded to Laura and handed her the bag of herbs, "Go on ahead, I'll be right there. I'm a friend of Mary's, Ranger. She asked for me to come and be with her." Ranger nodded, and a small smile crossed his lips, "Going to work your natural magic, eh?" Vanessa chuckled lightly, and was about to walk away when he grabbed her arm, "Nessa..." it sounded wrong coming from him, now that she and Adam... Shaking her head, she turned back to him, "Yes, Ranger?" She could see it in his eyes.

He knew.

"This Adam Cartwright you once told me about...he's the one that you talked with at the ball, isn't he?" Vanessa nodded, "Yes..." Ranger nodded and dropped his grip on her arm, "I see." He looked into her eyes, "you look the way my wife did when we were first married...You love him don't you?" She couldn't deny it, not after last night. "I do, Ranger. It's like it was before..." Ranger smiled, "Then I suppose you and I..." Vanessa shook her head sadly, "No, we can't Ranger." he was so cute, trying so hard to be the big man, the Vanessa couldn't help herself and put a hand on his cheek, "You're a good man, Ranger Kirkpatrick, but not my man." Ranger drew a deep breath and put his hands on her shoulders, lightly kissing her cheek, "I wish you all the luck in the world, Vanessa Warrick. I hope he's as good as you wish him." Vanessa held in a chuckle, 'oh..you have no idea.'

All conversation stopped as the doctor poked his head out the door, and waved at Vanessa, "Ms. Warrick, she wants to see you." Vanessa put a hand on Ranger's arm and walked into the bedroom. She waited until the door closed behind her, then started about her work. "So, how is she?" Laura was near the small fireplace, brewing the raspberry leaves into a tea. Vanessa went to a side table where her bag of herbs sat and removed a towel that she kept there, and tied it around her waist. The doctor told her everything he knew, and Vanessa nodded appropriately and rolled up her sleeves. "I can't get that baby to turn. I've done everything I can, and yet..." Vanessa smiled, "I'm glad that you called for me." The doctor returned the smile, "I thought it would be wise. Mary's so tired, she's near passed out." Laura called over to her, "Ms Nessa, the tea's almost ready." Vanessa went over to her, and filled a glass with the warm liquid.

Mary's contractions were getting worse, but that darned baby wouldn't move. After drinking the tea, Vanessa had made her gnaw on some Black Haw leaves, telling the doctor that it would help her belly relax enough that they could get a better grip on the baby. That had been almost fifteen minutes ago, and now the doctor could finally feel the child. "No wonder you're in so much pain, Mary. This baby's sideways." Vanessa took a deep breath and smiled at her friend, "Mary, darling. I need you to do something for me." Mary nodded as another contraction hit. Vanessa waved Laura over and had her bring another cup of the tea, "Keep drinking this, Mary. It will help you and your baby." Mary nodded and took the cup from Laura. Vanessa put a hand on Laura's shoulder, "Stay up here with her. Keep her talking." Laura nodded as Vanessa moved away. She met the doctor by Mary's exposed hip, and whispered, "Alright doctor, I say it's time for that baby to meet the world!"

* * *

Three hours had passed since Vanessa had gone into the bedroom, and every hour Madame Maria came into the sitting room to see if anything had happened. On her fourth visit, Maria was about to leave when the door to Mary bedroom opened, and Vanessa emerged, her hands and front covered with blood. Maria turned back and hurried to her young friend, "Vanessa...how?" Vanessa looked up at her and grinned widely, nudging the door open with her foot. Maria looked past her into the newly lit room to Mary's bed. "She's named him Nicholas." Vanessa whispered, and the entire waiting room heard the soft wail of a newborn babe. Maria smiled and hurried into the bedroom, closing the door behind her.

Vanessa took a deep relaxing breath, and wiped her hands on the towel around her waist. Three long hard hours, she was physically and emotionally exhausted. She hadn't had a good night's sleep since she'd learned of Adam's arrival to New Orleans, then she'd added to it the emotional strain of the ball, dancing with him...making love to him...and now she'd spent three hard hours birthing her friend's child. She collapsed into one of the plush chairs around the room, closed her eyes and nearly went to sleep. "Ms Nessa?" she frowned, "Yes, Laura?" Laura was kneeling next to her chair, looking at her worriedly, "It's Ms Maria. She says that you're to take a bath and relax a bit before going home." Vanessa smirked, "Laura, if I take a rest, I'm liable to sleep well into next week!" she opened her eyes and groaned, "Although, a warm bath does sound like a good idea."

Ben turned to Sarah with a glare in his eyes, "She's gone where?" Sarah cringed, she didn't want to make her niece look like the harlot she wasn't. She took a breath and glanced at Adam, who was now standing next to his father, "It was when she first arrived. Vanessa only knew that she had a relative here, she'd never met me before. When she got off the train to get here, the first person she met was Maria Raymond. Maria helped her find me, and they have been good friends ever since. Nessa's taken care of her girls whenever she can." Adam swallowed, "Vanessa's quite the healer, but I would like to know where this Maria's house is." Elizabeth joined in, "That's where you're not going to be happy, Mr. Cartwright. You see, Maria's house is on one of the meaner boardwalks in the southern half of town." Ben glanced at his son to gauge his reaction. Adam set his jaw and pinched the bridge of his nose. Vanessa was headstrong and stubborn, and he knew that she was more than capable of taking care of herself, but he did not like her going into this dangerous part of town. "How do I get there?" he growled, staring Nessa's aunt down.

Vanessa leaned back in the porcelain tub in Maria's rooms and sighed contentedly. "Ah, Maria. You spoil me." Maria was reclining on the grand bed in the room, her hair undone and spread across the pillow, and she giggled like the young girl she used to be. "You deserve it Vanessa. After what you did for Mary today, I don't think anyone else could have helped her." Vanessa closed her eyes and let Maria's personal eunuch pour more hot water into the tub, "I didn't do anything that doctor couldn't." Maria snorted, "Yeah, if he knew about it." Vanessa chuckled to herself and rolled her head forward, stretching the muscles in her back. Maria saw the movement and went to kneel next to her friend, "Here, let me help." As Maria began to massage Vanessa's neck, she noticed something. "Vanessa, dear. Would you mind explaining to me what this is?" Vanessa opened her eyes, her back muscles tensing beneath Maria's hands. Maria smiled knowingly, "This...here." she ran her fingers along the spot, and Vanessa stopped breathing. What Maria had just touched so gently was an old scar...one that she'd already had to explain to Adam. "It's an old wound..." she tried to evade the question, but Maria was having none of it. "It's a pretty bad gash, Nessa. Where did you get it, back home?" Vanessa nodded, and swallowed the memory.

_The girl and her horse were almost as one as they moved, Hades would leap from the ground and Vanessa would absorb the return as though it never happened. But no matter how long the two worked together or how in tune they could possibly be with the other, there was always the chance that sometime, somewhere, something would go wrong._

"My horse and I were going for a ride...when I was about sixteen. I had been cooped up in the house all day, and I just wanted some free time." She swallowed hard as Maria continued to massage her. Maria's touch lightened, "So....what happened?" Vanessa chuckled a little, "You ever tangled with a mountain lion?" Maria snorted, "Vanessa, you know full well I haven't." Vanessa turned her head slightly to look at her, "Pray you never will. I barely escaped, and that scar's the only momento I have." Maria pulled back from Vanessa and sighed, "That's not everything is it?" Vanessa leaned back and looked up at her friend, "No, it isn't." Maria stared at hard, then grinned, "Who is he?" Vanessa flushed a light pink, "Adam Cartwright. Is it that obvious?" Maria laughed and patted Vanessa's shoulder as she stood, "Vanessa Warrick, you are in love! And unless I miss my guess, you've given in to him already." Vanessa's face went bright red, and Maria really let out a laugh. "You're half right." Vanessa admitted, and Maria's eye's bulged, "You're kidding." Vanessa shook her head, "I..." she swallowed, it was bad that Maria knew this much. Maria raised her eyebrows knowingly, "When did it happen?" That was harder for her to say, and she focused on washing her hair. Maria chuckled good naturedly, "Alright, I can guess." She tapped a finger on her chin, "Let's see, Adam Cartwright, eh? You came to see me when he sent you that book of sonnets four days ago," She watched Vanessa for a reaction, "And your aunt held that ball last night," Vanessa's shoulders hunched more, "LAST NIGHT? Vanessa, you made love to the man you love for the first time last night and then rode bareback to my place all the way from your aunts? You really must be hurting." The girl in the tub giggled, "Maria, I was raised on a ranch, I can handle being a little sore..." she yawned widely, and dropped her head back to rinse her hair, "When was the last time you slept?" Vanessa smirked, "Any or at all?" Maria raised a demanding eyebrow and Vanessa confessed, "I haven't slept well since I learned he was in New Orleans, but I haven't gotten any sleep at all since night 'fore last."

Maria glowered at her friend, "That much huh?" Vanessa ran her hands through her hair, making sure all the soap was gone, "Maria, please. I'm not in the mood." the older woman stood and grabbed a towel hanging on the rack near the fireplace, holding it up as Vanessa pulled herself from the water. Vanessa took over, and stepped out of the tub as graceful as a dancer. Maria was staring at the bathwater, and gave a low whistle, "I'm willing to bet that a lot of that isn't Mary's." she whispered, making Vanessa turn back to look at it.

It was pink with blood.

Vanessa felt her knees go weak, and latched onto Maria for support, "I wasn't expecting that." she whispered back, and let the older woman lead her to the oversized bed. "Here," she pushed a silver brush into her hand and started giving her commands, "You are staying here, to relax for a while. I've sent a note to your aunt saying that you're having supper with me. And for now, _**you**_ are going to get some rest." Vanessa opened her mouth to protest, but Maria overrode her, "I'm not taking no for an answer, young lady. I remember my first time and my gut's telling me that your feeling the same way I did. Tired, sore, but oh so happy." Vanessa looked up at her, and smiled, "Happy...that's an understatement." Maria let out a soft laugh, and patted her hand. "Just do as your told, Vanessa. I'll come and get you in a few hours for supper."

Maria was walking down the main staircase when her front door opened and there stood a man, tall as a church steeple and built like one of her bouncers. His shoulders were broad and from them hung a pair of arms that looked like they were used to hard labor; he wore a deep red shirt with blue jeans. Even at forty years old, Maria had to catch her breath at his appearance, "I'm sorry, but we're not accepting callers today." the man removed his hat, and she saw he had a full thick head of black hair, and accusing hazel eyes, "My name's Adam Cartwright, and I was told that Vanessa Warrick is here." Maria raised an eyebrow at him. 'Vanessa sweetie, you sure know how to pick 'em.' she thought to herself, "She's here alright, but I've just set her down for a nap." he took a step forward as though he meant to climb the stairs, "Now hold your horses young man, that girl needs some rest after what you put her through last night." Adam froze, "Did she tell you that?" Maria shook her head, "No, but I am beginning to think I've been in this business a little too long." He walked up the stairs, stopping on the step where she was, "I'll see her. Now."

Vanessa set down the brush on the vanity and shook out her hair to help it dry. Glancing herself over in the gilded mirror Maria had, Vanessa took a deep breath and opened the towel she'd tied around herself. The blood in the bathwater wasn't from her flow, Maria had been wrong about it not being from Mary. Her skirts and petticoats were soaked clean through from Nicholas' birth, Aunt Sarah would chew her hide for ruining her new dress like that, but it couldn't be helped. She drew a deep breath and laid down on the bed, drawing the coverlet over herself and closed her eyes. 'Oh, goodness this is wonderful.'

Maria gripped the handle to the room where she'd left Vanessa to sleep, and looked pointedly at Adam, "This girl needs her rest, Mr Cartwright. If I let you in there, what are you going to do?" Adam didn't answer, he didn't really know himself. All he knew was that he wanted to see Vanessa, hold her against him again...maybe kiss her again. Maria nodded, "I see. Well then, I'll let my cooks know that we'll be having two guests for supper." she gently pushed the door open, and left Adam to himself. As she walked back down the hall, Maria had time to think. Should she really have left them alone like that..in _this_ house? She shook her head to clear it and kept on walking. Yes, they were in her house, a house of beautiful women and strong drink. It was no secret that Maria took good care of all of her girls, and that included any woman that set foot beneath her roof. 'Adam Cartwright better damn well know what he's doing.' she thought as she bustled through her kitchen, directing meals to the different girls' rooms, 'If he hurts Vanessa...'

Adam closed the door behind him, and stared at the woman on the bed. Her hair was spread across the pillows, framing her face in a dark halo. She had one arm up on her hair, the hand buried beneath the pillow, her other arm was across her belly, just below her bust. He could tell she wasn't wearing anything, or if she was, it certainly didn't cover her shoulders. The words from one of his favorite poems came to the forefront of his mind, She Walks in Beauty by Lord Byron

_She walks in beauty, like the night  
Of cloudless climes and starry skies; ..._

_... Where thoughts serenely sweet express  
How pure, how dear their dwelling place.  
And on that cheek, and o'er that brow,  
So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,  
The smiles that win, the tints that glow,  
But tell of days in goodness spent,  
A mind at peace with all below,  
A heart whose love is innocent! _

Innocent. Yes, Vanessa was a strong woman, able to ride a horse like a man, he'd seen her wear jeans and a hat like a man, he'd watched her play poker like a man, do everything that her ranch needed as good as the men around her, but she was innocent to the ways of the world. Well, innocent to a degree... he sat on the bed next to her, and brushed back a stray wisp of hair from her cheek. Innocent...and he planned on keeping her that way, as soon as she married him. He'd got the whole thing planned out on his way to the house; as soon as she really said yes, he'd take her before the local priest and they'd seal the deal. She took a shuddering breath in her sleep and rolled onto her side, pulling the blanket with her. She'd exposed her back...and that nasty scar she'd gotten all those years ago. She'd told him that she'd gotten it from a mountain lion attack, but it was a single scar, not the trio he'd expect a claw mark to look like. No, this looked too much like a knife wound and it seared his gut to think of someone stabbing his girl. '_His girl?'_ Where had that come from? She wasn't his yet...'but she had been.' he thought, bringing a hand to rest on her creamy shoulder, 'If you'd only married her right then and there, and not let her get away. You wouldn't be having this time with her here, you'd be at that Ponderosa.' She made a soft whimper and rolled back to face him, an angry wrinkle marring her face. He smiled and gently rubbed at it, what could she possibly be worrying about?

He took a deep breath and shook his head. He knew full well what a woman of Vanessa's caliber would be worried about. 'Pregnancy.' the word echoed through his mind, and his hand trailed down her body to her covered belly. 'Her child,' he thought warmly, then corrected himself, '_our_ child.' it made his heart beat a little faster. He could see a little girl running around the front yard of the Ponderosa, chasing the fresh litter of piglets. The image changed to the main room of the house, and Vanessa was there, holding the little girl on her lap, reading her a story before the blazing fire.

"Adam?" she grumbled, and leaned herself up on her elbow, "Adam, what are you...?" he put a finger over her mouth, "Easy girl. I've come to fetch you home." She knit her brows together, "The Ponderosa?" He smiled brightly, "Yes...the Ponderosa. Right after you marry me." She chuckled thickly, still trying to wake up, "Adam...now is most unquestionably not the best time to be discussing marriage." His smile changed to his cocky grin, and he slid a hand down her chest to where the blanket was held, "On the contrary, I'd think this is the perfect time." She pushed his hand away playfully, and laid back to stare at the ceiling, "I told you before Adam. I made my decision, what about you?" He hung his head, "Nessa, that's no answer." she smiled, and then scooted away from him, taking one of the blankets with her. She wrapped it around herself as she stood, and went to the small desk that Maria kept in one corner. "Very well then, Adam. This is your answer." She picked up a pencil, and wrote two words on the paper. She folded it in half, then walked it over to him, holding it out in front of her. She stopped only a few steps away from him, and he took the sheet. Opening it carefully, he read the words on it and looked up at her, "You're serious then." She moved closer and put her free hand on her hip, "As serious as the first time you asked me two years ago."

He stood and took her in his arms, "Alright. Where can we find a priest at this time of day?" Vanessa smiled warmly, "First let's find me some clothes." He grinned wickedly, and took two good handfuls of the blanket in his fists, "No...I've got a better idea of what to do first." He led her back to the bed, and as they lay back on it, the sheet of paper slipped to the floor, now completely ignored.


	10. A Reunion

Adam lay back on the pillows, one hand behind his head and the other slung across Vanessa's body as she snuggled into his shoulder. The ceremony could wait another hour or two, he could tell she was exhausted. He looked down at her, hair spread across the pillows and her shoulders, shielding her from the world. The blanket was only drawn high enough to cover her hip, leaving her torso exposed.

There came a soft knock to the door, and Adam looked up as Maria entered the room, closing the door behind her back. She watched Adam carefully, and smiled as she recalled Vanessa's description of him, _"He's built like those sailors you love so much,with arms that look like they could fell a tree and legs that would make you weep. Tall as a Ponderosa pine, with dark hair and eyes that can cut to your soul, and a wit sharp enough to cut steel. I swear Maria, Adam could talk a croc out of eating meat."_ And now that she'd seen the man, she knew that Vanessa's description hadn't nearly been enough to prepare her. His chest was covered with hair, but even so Maria could see the hard cut of his pectorals and upper abdomen as he lay on the bed watching her. The thickness of his bicep, even relaxed, made the life-weary whore shudder. She'd hate to see that arm tense with a swing against anything, especially human flesh. His voice startled her, "I don't recall letting you in here." Maria took a breath, realizing that she'd been holding it, and tried to smile, "I don't recall giving _you_ free reign of my rooms, either, Mr. Cartwright." she glanced at Vanessa who still slept near Adam, "Besides, you're in _my_ bed with one of _my_ friends." He was quick to pull the blanket up over Vanessa's shoulder, but never took his his eyes from Maria's face.

Maria shook her head and went to her wardrobe, "Vanessa's dress was all but ruined from the birthing, so I'm going to lend her some of my older clothing." Pulling the door open, she removed a blue split skirt and tan top, with a wide black belt and matching boots. Maria had second thoughts about the boots, and removed a second pair. "I'm not quite sure of her size, so let her know..." Vanessa shifted in her sleep, but didn't wake. Maria put the clothes on the bed and made to leave the room. Her foot crackled on a sheet of paper on the floor, and she bent to pick it up. Once straight, she realized that he hadn't taken his eyes from her, and sighed heavily, "You know Mr. Cartwright, you're going to have to trust me at some point." She raised her eyebrow at him, and left the room, folding the slip of paper into her pocket.

Adam waited for her footsteps to disappear, then gently put a hand on Vanessa's shoulder, "Vanessa...Nessa darling," he whispered, "Supper's ready..." She shifted again, rolling away from him and frowning, "Ugh. You go and tell me if it's worth it." He smiled and leaned in close to her, "Vanessa Cartwright, if you don't get out of this bed I'm going to..." Her frown flipped as he kept talking, laughing aloud as his hands came in contact with her hips, tickling her. "Adam, you keep talking like that and I'm not leaving." He chuckled and slipped out of the bed, grabbing his pants and shirt, "I'll let you dress, Nessa. When you're ready, come downstairs." Vanessa stared at the ceiling, a contented sigh releasing her lungs.

Adam had called her Vanessa Cartwright.

She sat up in the bed, holding the blankets over her chest and looked at the clothes Maria had laid out for her. She'd been awake when the woman had come in, an old habit from the many trails she'd had to ride with her father. At least Maria was a good judge of size, the clothes looked as though they'd fit perfectly. Shrugging into the shirt, she buttoned it to just below her throat, then threw on the skirt. It was slightly longer than she was used to for a split style, but that didn't matter too much. Tucking the shirt into the skirt, she turned to the mirror to make sure she was set. All she needed was...a belt. Once it was slung around her hips, she bobbed her head once at herself, happy with the way she looked.

The kitchen in the house was down the side hall, more easily reached via the servants staircase at the back of the house. She'd barely made it down the steps when she heard the shouts. Vanessa crept outside the doorway and watched in shock as a male body was flung backwards into the wall. The man got to his feet and lunged forward, and she could hear the sounds of flesh being pummeled, the hidden grunts and groans as fists connected with their targets. Then came the sound of breaking glass, wood splintering against wood...then all was silent except for someone's heavy breathing. Cautiously, she pressed the door open, and the sight before her stopped her heart. Adam lay on the floor, his face turning black and blue from taking hits, his nose was bleeding. But the man he was glaring at scared her even that much more.

He stood with the pride of his forefathers, bare chested and sweating heavily, his hands splayed against his hips and face staring down at both her and Adam. Vanessa only gave him a quick glance before kneeling to see to Adam, who gripped her arm tightly and used her to get to his feet. "Get out of here, Nessa." he growled, gently putting himself between her and his attacker. She shook her head, "I'm not leaving, Adam." she whispered, tightening her grip on his belt. The man across from them chuckled, "That's one thing you'll have to learn, Mr. Cartwright. Once my sister has made up her mind, well, there's really no changing it." Vanessa felt her stomach drop out from under her. Adam risked a glance back at her and frowned, _"Sister?"_ She was shaking, but he couldn't tell if it was from fear or something else. The newcomer was nodding, his face breaking out into a smile, "Yes. Vanessa Warrick is my sister."

Vanessa swallowed, "Nice to see you too, Black Arrow."


	11. The Story

Black Arrow was still standing before them, hands on hips and chest heaving. His breath was slowly coming back to him, and Vanessa knew that when it did, he would most likely attack again. She'd seen Adam fight before, knew that he'd had plenty of practice back home. He'd taught Hoss and Joe how to fight and had taken plenty of lickings from either of them and still come out on top. But she'd also seen how Black Arrow fought, the man was low and fought dirty. She knew that somewhere beneath those pants he wore was a small throwing knife...a knife she'd felt the taste of once before. She took a deep breath and tried to stare Black Arrow down.

"What are you doing here?" she seethed, keeping her grip on Adam's belt. Black Arrow smirked, "I came to be sure that this brute does right by you." Vanessa's eyes widened and one hand slipped from Adam's waist, "What are you talking about?" Black Arrow dropped into the one chair that hadn't been destroyed or overturned and leaned his elbows on his knees, "Vanessa, you really think that you and you're Aunt Sarah are the only ones who know about that hot spring on her property?" Vanessa's stomach flipped, "What do you mean..."

Adam knew, and he growled angrily at their attacker, "You filthy..." Black Arrow held up his hand, "Oh no! I didn't do nothing of that sort. I arrived here about two weeks after you did, sister, and I've been watching over you ever since. I was at the ball last night, I saw your face when this brute grabbed you up, and I also saw how you were acting when you came back inside from talking with him." He gripped his hands together tightly, and glared at Adam, "I know what you did to her, Adam Cartwright. Both back at the Summerset and here, in New Orleans." Adam stiffened, and Vanessa glanced at him. "Adam..." her voice was warning. Black Arrow continued, "Well, aren't you going to tell her, Mr. Cartwright?" Vanessa looked up at him, "Adam, what..."

Adam set his jaw, and turned away from her, "Vanessa, you get out of here." he growled again, but she didn't move. Just let him pull out of her grasp as he walked to the fireplace and braced his arm against it, wiping his nose with his shirt before putting his hand on his hip. Vanessa watched him pull away from her, and keep his back to her. Her heart sank, in the course of twenty-four hours, her life had turned around a full three hundred and sixty degrees. When she'd come to New Orleans, she'd thought she'd seen the last of Adam's back to her, and then the ball...and that night in the cave, she'd honestly thought that he'd come back to her. But now, as he stared into the kitchen fire and ignored her insistent stare, she knew it had to be too good to be true. Swallowing her tears, she kicked at a downed table, and stormed out of the room, fighting the racking sobs that threatened to erupt any moment.

Black Arrow watched his sister leave the room, but didn't follow. She wouldn't get far anyway, Maria would stop her soon enough. His primary problem right now was the cowboy leaning against the mantle, his shoulders taut with anger. Adam took three deep breaths, exhaling each slowly, before he turned to Black Arrow, "She never mentioned a brother." he hissed, folding his arms defensively across his chest. Black Arrow smirked and looked at the floor, "I'm not really her brother. Not by blood anyway." Adam waited, and Black Arrow looked back up at him, "When Vanessa was sixteen, she'd been fool enough to go riding her blasted horse into Paiute country. It was known amongst my people that she was a daughter of our tribe, but the Warricks had taken her in as their child. She would often accompany Nicholas on trips to help the chief with the local authorities, and even in the bringing of food for the winter when times were hard. The command from the chief was that she wasn't to be hurt if she was ever found on our land...but apparently one of the younger braves failed to..._understand_ the message." Black Arrow paused, letting his meaning sink in. Adam blew out his breath and kicked up a chair to sit in, "The scar on her back." Black Arrow nodded, "You've seen it? She's usually protective of showing that to anyone." Adam gave him a look, "Do I really have to answer that?" Black Arrow nodded, "All I saw last night was her and then you entering that cave, nothing more. I waited all night for someone to leave...and when you both left so close together, I could put the pieces together." He sniffed and rubbed a hand across his chest, "You can sure hit..." he half chuckled and shook his head, "I should have known Vanessa would choose one of you Cartwrights." That caught Adam's attention, "What do you mean?" Black Arrow grinned, "Whenever she came home, it was all she could talk about. Especially this tall dark one that would chase her around the ranch as though he wanted to kill her for some thing or other."

Adam raised and eyebrow, and ruefully rubbed his cheek, "She did, did she?" he stopped and looked up at Black Arrow again, "Finish your story, Black Arrow?" Vanessa's brother nodded, "Alright, I should." He took another breath, "I came up on her as she was riding through a patch of trees with Hades, when that brave pounced on her. Just fell from the trees like a..."

"A mountain lion." Adam whispered, and Black Arrow nodded, "It's how he got his name. In English, that braves name was Cougar Blood." Adam nodded, the anger for being lied to subsiding slightly, "so when she says she got that scar in a mountain lion attack..." Black Arrow took over, "It's not much of a stretch. And if anyone doesn't ask for clarification, all the better." He rubbed the sheath on his leg where the knife sat against his skin, "Anyway. Like I was saying, I came across them, watched him drop on her and well, I had to do something. I raced at them, and had pulled Cougar Blood from her body, but not before he got this knife into her." He pulled the weapon from his leg, breaking the skin enough to draw blood, but not much more. Adam saw it, and asked, "Why'd you do that?" Black Arrow shrugged, "I do it to remember."

"Remember what?" Black Arrow sighed, "Remember that because of me, my brother nearly killed Vanessa." Adam's muscles tensed, and his jaw started ticking, "Because of you? Your brother? Boy, I think you'd best start again from the beginning." … … … … …

_Black Arrow knelt next to his brothers bed, the heat from the summer fever radiating even at his distance. The Healer Lady had already come and gone, and her words hung heavy on Arrow's ears, "They're both bad, Black Arrow. At this point, you have to make a choice. We can help one or the other, but not both, not this way." She'd grabbed her daughters hand then, and led the young lady from the tent. Arrow had followed them, and asked, "Who would you choose,Jennifer?" the woman had stopped, and glanced at her daughter. She'd turned to him, "When my sister died there was little I could do. Your brother in there is bad, real bad. If he'd let the doctors near them sooner, perhaps we could save them, but since he didn't you've got an awful choice to make. Your sister in law's pregnant, and there isn't a thing I can give her to break that fever and save that baby. Even if I did, that child would be changed." she drew a shuddering breath, "I don't envy you your choice, Black Arrow. I've given them something for the pain for tonight, nothing that will hurt that baby. You'd best make up your mind quick, because the way that fevers going, they may die tonight without any help from you or me." As she climbed into the wagon, Vanessa had grabbed his hand and looked up into his face, "Black Arrow, if you need someone to stay with you, I will." Jennifer had huffed slightly, but said nothing. Black Arrow had patted her shoulder, then said, "No, Vanessa. You'd best be going home." Vanessa had nodded, and scrambled to getting into the wagon seat beside her mother. Before Jennifer could get the horses to move, Vanessa had grabbed onto his shoulder and leaned forward to whisper in his ear, "I'll be your sister, Arrow. If you need one."_

Adam leaned back in his chair, "So that's how she became your sister." Arrow nodded, "I'd given this knife to my brother to protect his wife, but when I chose him over her and the baby, Cougar Blood lost all sense of reason." Arrow flipped the knife in the air and caught the blade end in his palm. Adam nodded, "I'd appreciate it if you'd put that thing away." Arrow chuckled and did as he was asked, "Anything else you want to know?" Adam stared at him, "You said you knew how I hurt her at the Summerset. How would you know about that?" Arrow grinned, and rubbed his thigh, "She's my sister, and just like you know what your brothers are feeling, I know when Vanessa's heart hurts. I saw her first when she returned from that fight you got into when you left..." Adam put up his hand, "Ah, Solomon told me all about it already." Arrow raised an eyebrow at him, "Did he now? Did he tell you that Vanessa cried for a hour straight when you left like that?" Adam's jaw dropped slightly, "She what?" Arrow nodded, now completely solemn. "You left her with an ultimatum, Adam Cartwright, remember? Either come back with you then, or forget the whole thing?" Adam just watched him, dumbfounded, "Well, she did what she thought was right. She chose you over her home, the land she's known her entire life. She gave that land to a pair of folks that she knew she could trust it with and went to Virginia City to find you, and let you know. The day she arrived was the day that your little Laura Dayton had that incident with those men and horses. She was on that horse you gave her when she watched you rush out to her, and carry her into the hotel. She watched every move you made that day, even snuck into the hotel to listen to what had happened...and gave you up. She denied her own heart that day, Adam. Bought passage on the stage and then came here." Arrow folded his arms again and glared at the man his sister had given up everything for. "You have anything to say to defend yourself? Or do you deny that you deserve every hit I gave you just now?"

Adam swallowed, "You're right. I deserved every last one." Arrow nodded smartly and stood, offering his hand to Adam, "Alright then, let's get you to Vanessa so you can confess your love and save her from doing something foolish."

Vanessa sat in Mary's private parlor, in the rocking chair near the fire holding the newborn Nicholas as he slept. He was so tiny...and so perfect. His hand reached up, and let her finger get caught in his soft grip. The boy yawned widely and she couldn't help but smile. A poem her mother often quoted to her came to mind, and she whispered it to the boy as she slowly rocked back and forth;

"_Is love a fancy, or a feeling? _

_No It is immortal as immaculate truth _

_'Tis not a blossom shed as soon as Youth _

_Drops from the stem of life for it will grow _

_In barren regions, where no waters flow _

_Nor ray of promise cheats the pensive gloom--"_

Adam knelt beside her chair, "Hartley Coleridge, isn't it?" She smiled softly, she hadn't even heard him come in, "His seventh sonnet." she said, not taking her eyes of the child. Nicholas had a light dusting of his mothers brown hair, and a shock of it was peeking out from the blanket that Vanessa had him wrapped in. She brought up a hand to brush it back, and tightened the blanket around the baby. "How could something so small give someone so much trouble." Adam whispered, his eyes roving over her face. There was a softness there that he'd never seen before, a gentleness that made him smile. She giggled, "You'd be surprised, Adam." she was whispering, trying not to wake the baby, then she sighed "All my life I've watched other people with siblings play with them, tease them, protect them. And then I watched as those same people grew up, got married and had children of their own." She looked at Adam, a hurt hidden deep in her eyes, "you should consider yourself lucky, Adam." Adam's brow wrinkled, not following her train of thought, "Lucky? For what?" She smiled, and cuddled the baby closer, kissing his forehead, "For having brothers. Don't forget, I was an only child. All my life my mother helped other women have their babies, expand their families, and not once did she complain that she could ever have one for herself." Mary stirred on the bed that Vanessa had helped her set up in the room, and Adam watched as she walked over to the mother and laid the babe in her waiting arms. Mary whimpered something that he couldn't quite hear, and Vanessa's voice soothed whatever fear the woman had.

Vanessa straightened, then waved to Adam to get him out, "They're asleep now, come on." He moved over to her, and waited just outside the room until the doors closed before he grabbed her arms and pulled her to him, "Vanessa, I want to apologize about earlier." Vanessa smiled at him, and shook her head, "You've nothing to apologize for, Adam. I should have told you about Arrow, and the real story about this." she pointed to her back, "I'm the one who should be asking forgiveness." Adam smiled, "Alright...now, can we get on with our life?" Vanessa raised an eyebrow at him, "Our life? Adam, we're not married yet." His smiled widened.


	12. Capture

Hoss Cartwright stared at his little brother, then tore the slip of paper away from Little Joe, "Lemme see that!" His eyes scanned the page, then turned to his brother, a big smile on his face, "Well then whadaya know. Adam dun gone an got himself married!" Little Joe let out a loud whoop of joy and jumped up and down, "He did it! He got married! And to a good southern girl too!" As Joe pranced about the yard, hooping and hollering as though he had won a big pot in a poker game, Hoss studied the telegram note they'd gotten. It sounded like Adam alright...

One thing bothered Hoss though, his brother had failed to mention the name of the lucky little gal he'd snagged.

Adam grabbed Vanessa up to him after they left the telegraph office, tugging her down a small alley and hugging her tight "Well, that was the easy one. The hard one's going to be telling Pa." Vanessa's bright smile faltered, "Why? I would think your father would be happy for you." she checked herself, "For _us._" Adam smiled his happy smile, and tightened his grip around her waist, "Yes he will be, but he's always had this dream about seeing all three of us boys getting married on the Ponderosa." He set her down and took her hand in his, "Come with me. I've got a hotel room for us tonight."

Maria had been right, he'd had to trust her about handling both Nessa's aunt and his father for the next few days. He fully intended to give Vanessa a proper honeymoon, even if it was only to a hotel in town. Their first night together still replayed in his mind, and it bothered him that of all the times they'd made love, he'd only once had her in a proper bed, and even then it had been the bed of a whore. No, his Nessa deserved something better than the mud covered ground of a cave and a disreputable bed. She deserved a real bed, the loving bed that he could make for her.

----------

The house was empty, or at least it appeared so when Maria Raymond pulled up in front of it in her private buggy. One of Sarah Governs' stablehands came forward, and helped her to the ground. "Hello, Madame Maria." the voice was angry, and was coming from the front porch. Maria looked up and found herself looking into the glaring eyes of Sarah Governs. "Good evening, Ms Sarah. I was hoping I might talk with you...about Vanessa." Sarah's expression flinched, but otherwise stayed angry. Maria swallowed, 'Now be nice' she remembered Vanessa saying as she pulled on the dress Maria was letting her borrow, 'Aunt Sarah can be a real hard nose about some things, and I'm sorry to say I'm one of them. She'll be fire spittin mad that I'm not coming home with you.' Maria had said that she could handle the old widow, but now as she crested the stairs and looked at the woman, she could see why Vanessa had warned her to play nice. Sarah led the woman inside, and slammed the door shut behind them.

Elizabeth came running from her upstairs room, stopping on the stairs and leaning on the rail as she recognized Maria. "Evenin,Maria." she whispered, but Maria only nodded to her. "Now what's this about Vanessa?" Sarah asked, putting her hands on her hips, facing off against one of the hardest women in New Orleans. Maria looked down at her gloved hands, then whispered, "It's news that you've been waiting to hear, Widow Governs." Sarah's breath caught in her chest and she gripped Maria's arm, "Don't you tease me, Maria Raymond."

Sarah Governs was a twice widowed woman with no children of her own, the only enjoyment she had was the company of her nieces and nephews, getting them married off and watching their families grow. The only two left were Elizabeth and Vanessa, but Elizabeth was still too young, only two years younger than Vanessa, but she still had much to learn about the world. But Vanessa...Vanessa was more than old enough to be married off, and when she'd arrived complaining of a broken heart, Sarah had tried her best to distract her. Only a few months had passed before she noticed the hollowness in Vanessa's eyes, the shadow of an ache that she knew came from being separated from the one you love. And so she'd sent a letter to the Ponderosa ranch outside of Virginia City, Nevada Territory, addressed to Adam Cartwright. She'd explained everything, and asked him to come and save her niece. She'd waited another two months before she'd received a response, "Coming to New Orleans in Spring." Ever since then, she'd been real careful to not let Vanessa get to attached to Ranger Krikpatrick, to wait for Adam to arrive in the Spring. She knew what ranch life entailed, and knew that this man would be coming at one of the most busy times of ranch life. And here he was, giving everything he could to get her niece to live again.

Maria read the woman's thoughts and withdrew a sheet of paper from her purse, "This." she handed it to Sarah, who read it and then squealed in delight, "Elizabeth, go open your cousins trunk, we're going to pack her clothes and send her home!" Elizabeth didn't ask any questions, but she did hold out her hand to see the paper. Sarah handed it to her, and watched her young niece read the two words inscribed there. Elizabeth's lips followed her eyes, mouthing the words, and whispering them to herself, then smiling brightly at her aunt, "Vanessa Cartwright."

----------

He was having a small drink in the dinning hall, and from where he was seated he had a perfect view of the hotel lobby. Ben Cartwright watched his oldest son practically drag Vanessa into the hotel, sign for a room and lead her up the stairs. The sight surprised him, and made him take another drink, what was his oldest son doing...in a hotel...the thought bowled him over like a stampede. _No!_ Adam wouldn't be...He loved Vanessa, didn't he? He wouldn't... wouldn't ruin her reputation by... Ben put the glass down and marched into the lobby, "That man and woman that just came in here, which room did they take?" the desk clerk looked down at his ledger, "He took a room on the third floor, room number 3-1." Ben nodded his thanks and set up the stairs at a march, he'd be damned before he let his son make this terrible a mistake.

They reached the room, and once inside were all over each other. Adam's hands were holding her, pulling on her clothes, needing to see her once again. The bed felt like it was miles away, but he knew it was only a few steps behind her. "Adam." she whispered, pushing him away from her. He growled at her and pulled her back, attacking her neck with his lips, "Adam!" she said, more insistent now. He continued to ignore her until a big beefy hand gripped his shoulder and pulled her bodily away from her. He landed on his side, his back still to the intruder. Why wasn't Nessa screaming? Maybe the newcomer had her in some sort of attack. He turned on his heel, ready to lunge at the man who'd thrown him off his wife, and froze when he saw his father. "Pa!" he grunted, and the great man glared at his eldest son, "I didn't believe it, I just don't believe it! Of all the bull-headed, foolish things I've seen you do in your life, this takes the cake!" Ben was almost shouting, and Vanessa hurried to shut the door, but Ben grabbed her arm, "And YOU! Following him, letting him bring you in here... to do god only knows what with you. Your mother would skin me alive if she knew that I'd let..."

"PA!" Adam shouted himself. Ben turned to him, and released Vanessa. She moved to the door and shut it tightly. Once they were cut off from the rest of the world, Adam launched into his father, "Pa, we're married." Ben felt his eyes widen, "You're what?" Vanessa moved quickly from behind Ben and knelt next to Adam, helping him stand, "You heard me, I said we were married. Been that way for about...three hours now." Vanessa watched Ben's face for the anger she'd expected to see, but was surprised when he looked at her in wonderment, "You mean to tell me that..."

He couldn't speak. He'd waited so long to hear that this one, Elizabeth's son, had finally found someone he deemed worthy of himself. When the two of them had announced their intentions to marry two years ago, he'd been happy for them. And when she'd left them, he'd felt his sons pain at her leaving, had encouraged him to ride after her and bring her back, and then when he'd learned that Vanessa had broken faith with him, deciding that she loved her land more than his son, he'd been just as hurt. But then Adam had admitted to still loving this girl, and he'd ridden alongside him to come to New Orleans and try to fetch her back...and now she was officially a Cartwright? Ben swallowed and stared at Vanessa, "You...married?" his breath was almost gone, it came out a shocked whisper. Vanessa grinned tentatively and nodded, "Yes, just as Adam says." Ben let out a loud guffaw and wrapped his arms around the girl, "Oh this is wonderful, absolutely wonderful!" he set her back down and looked to his son, "Adam, I..." Adam smirked and nodded, "I know, Pa. Now, would you mind..." he pointed to the door, and Ben caught the hint. Laughing the whole way, Ben let himself out of the room, closing the door tight behind him.

---------

Black Arrow watched as Maria left the home, then moved over to his own horse. "Alright, Titan. Our work is done here. What do you say we go home?" The brown horse nickered at him, and Arrow smiled, "I'm with you, let's go." As he tightened the cinch on the saddle, the back door to the house opened, and another man exited the house, "Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to know where I could find one Vanessa Warrick, do you?" Arrow chuckled, and turned to come eye to eye with a pair of brown eyes, "Well, for starters she's probably Vanessa Cartwright officially by now..." Arrow didn't see the malicious glint that came into the mans eye, "but yes, I can tell you where to find her if it's that important that you see her."

Ranger grinned.

Vanessa sat on the window seat, her feet tucked up under her nightgown as she watched the stars emerge from behind the clouds. She had waited until Adam fell asleep, and then had crawled up here, keeping a careful watch for whatever it was that had her belly in turmoil. She only got bellyaches when something bad was going to happen. She'd had a bad one the day of Ethan's attack and on the day her mother died. The only death that had caught her off-guard was her father's...and Hades...the thought of her beloved horse still set her on edge, and she had to take a deep breath to keep from crying. Hades, the horse that had more devil in him than the devil himself, or so her father had said. The blasted animal had broken a total of four legs, two arms and knocked enough of their men unconscious that Vanessa had found only she could handle the creature.

It was because of that particular choice on Hades' part that started their friendship, but it was the years of being together that had forged it tighter than welded metal. Vanessa had trained Hades so well that she didn't even have need of a bridle half the time, simple words, whistles and nudges were enough of a command for Hades. They'd spent so much time together that it wasn't really even needed for her to call for him, just appear on the front step and he'd come running for her. She'd missed that closeness with someone for a long time since she'd learned about his death, and now as she sat waiting for the moon to come out, she knew that she'd found something even better than that. She and Adam shared something that she could never have thought possible, and yet...

Adam stirred in his sleep and rolled over to find his new bride not in the bed beside him. Instead, she was sitting on the window seat, head leaned back against the sill, fast asleep as though she had been watching the stars roll past. He grinned, shook his head and got out of bed. It was only a few steps to the window, and then only a small matter of picking her up in his arms and carrying her back to bed. Vanessa's head rolled against his shoulder, and she let out a soft sigh, "What are you doing?" she asked as he laid her against the pillows, "You were at the window, I thought you'd be more comfortable here...with me." She grinned lazily and shuffled the blankets to bury her head, "Not if you can't find me." it was muffled by the blankets, but he caught the hint. Grabbing onto the blankets he pulled them back from her, and laughed aloud at her mock look of fright, "If you didn't want me in here, you should have said something." She shook her head and rolled away from him, tugging the blanket up around herself again, "I thought I did." he chuckled some more and slid in beside her, grabbing her waist and pulling her to him, "Are you happy, Nessa?" she sighed again and snuggled closer, pulling his upper arm up so that she could hold his hand. She turned it and kissed his palm, "I'd be happier if I could get some sleep." he chuckled again, kissing the top of her head, "You're that wore out, huh?" she laughed, "No, but you're almost more than I can handle."

She could feel his deep laugh as he pulled her tight against him, and kissed her neck and shoulder, "Well then, I better leave you be." He was about to pull away from her when they heard the footsteps in the hallway outside. Whomever it was jiggled the handle, then knocked, as though they had been expected. Vanessa felt him tense, as though he was waiting for a fight, and slid a ways away from him, and reached down for the gunbelt that they'd discarded earlier. Removing his weapon, she slid back to him, and handed him the weapon beneath the blankets. He took it, and held it against her side, the best angle for the door and waited.

The metal was cold against her skin.

There was a soft knock against the wood, and they didn't move. The person or whatever seemed to move on, and Adam lowered his mouth to her ear, "Get dressed, real slow and quiet." Vanessa nodded and slipped out from the blankets, feeling with her feet for the dress that Adam had so carelessly torn away from her earlier. Throwing it on over her nightgown, she tightened the belt and knelt bedside the bed, out of Adam's range of sight and hidden in shadow from the moonlight. The footsteps came back, and the knock returned. But this time, the intruder wasn't satisfied when they didn't answer, and began knocking more urgently. Vanessa heard the hammer draw back on Adam's gun, and he moved from the bed, his shirtless body framed in the moonlight for a moment before he disappeared as well.

The door creaked, as though someone was leaning hard against it, and then she heard the voice, "Vanessa...Vanessa, it's Ranger. I'm sorry to bother you, but it's Matthew. He's taken sick and the doctor won't see to him." Vanessa looked to where Adam had disappeared, and shuffled slightly. She could feel his eyes on her, trying to talk her out of what she was about to do. Carefully she stood, and tiptoed to the end of the bed, then spoke, "How bad is Matthew, Ranger?" She heard the shuffling of feet, and then Ranger spoke again, "Real bad, Vanessa. It looks like his mother's fever..." Vanessa started forward, but Adam was there at her side, holding her back. His frame was outlined in the moonlight, his face in shadow, but she could feel the heat of his gaze as he thought angry thoughts about her leaving. She stepped closer to him, and whispered, "Just let me open the door, let me tell him I'll be there in the morning." Adam's grip tightened suddenly, and tossed her aside as the door crashed open and Ranger's gun went off. Vanessa hit the floor hard, but instantly turned back to Adam...

Gunshot...Adam... "ADAM!" she screamed. He was on the floor, and something dark was staining the floor. He groaned slightly, but otherwise didn't show any sign of life. _'oh God.'_ she prayed, her heart aching, _'don't let him...no, God please. Not now...not when you've finally given him to me.'_ She was on her knees crawling to him when Ranger's hands grabbed her waist and hefted her to her feet. "Adam!" she squealed again, fighting tooth and nail as Ranger hauled her out of the room, "Adam!" She reached out and grabbed the doorjamb, preventing her from being taken further for another second, "Adam, please..." she whimpered, kicking her legs wildly, catching Ranger in the thigh but nothing more. Ranger adjusted his grip on her and shifted her to his side, protecting what she'd missed. For all her shouting and squirming, Adam still didn't move. The blood drained from her face, "No...." she gasped, and clung to the doorway as long as she could, "No!" she screamed at the top of her lungs, and finally heard the thundering footsteps of Ben on the stairs. Ranger reached up and grabbed her arms, gave one final yank and the two of them toppled over. He was quick to get back on his feet, and dragged her along with him, clamping one hand over her mouth and shoved the barrel of his gun under her chin as Ben rounded the corner.

The sight that met Ben's eyes was one from a nightmare. There stood his new daughter in law, held against a man with a gun under her chin, blood gone from her face. He could see she was trying not to cry, but the fact that he'd heard her screaming bloody murder just two seconds ago wasn't helping the pounding of his heart. His hand fell to his gun, but the man holding Vanessa shook his head, "I wouldn't. You move one finger and I'll blow her pretty little head right off, after all, that is what I was planning on doing in the first place." he adjusted his grip on her waist, and sneered at Ben, "You see, this little one here is a bonafide witch, confided such to me herself." Her eyes widened as she remembered that conversation, _"Come to work your natural magic?"_ he'd said, and she'd answered yes...no, not another man thinking she was a witch. Suddenly she thrashed and bit down hard on his hand. Ranger howled and dropped it out of her way, but kept it close, "Ben!" she cried, her voice sounded strangled, "Ben … Adam, he's...." she couldn't speak anymore, her throat closed with tears. It didn't help that Ranger jammed the gun further into her chin, slamming her mouth shut. Ranger moved backwards, hissing in her ear, "You try that again and I'll kill you right here!" Vanessa swallowed, but obeyed as he pulled her away from Ben and the open doorway which led to where Adam lay dying on the floor.

Ranger smiled wickedly, and carried her down the stairs, glaring at anyone who came across them. Down two flights of stairs, out the back door and tossed into the back of a wagon, Vanessa couldn't stop the tears rolling down her cheeks, or the dull ache building in her gut. _"No...No, God no. Not again, no please no. God, you know I haven't asked for much before in my life, but I'm begging you now. Please don't let Adam die..not yet...not until I tell him..."_ As Ranger cussed the wagon forward, Vanessa lurched in the bed and rolled against the side. _"Dear God please, no...please no."_

Adam found himself lying in a brightly lit field, although every time he lifted his head to see the sun, he couldn't move. Wildflowers sprouted everywhere around him, the warm summer breeze stirring their heads and releasing their heady fragrance. It was a beautiful scene but he couldn't quite figure out why he was here...the last thing he really remembered was being in a really soft bed with..who was it? Va...Ness... "Vanessa!" he shouted, but no sound came from his mouth.

There were footsteps thundering from somewhere off to his left, great heavy steps that sounded like his fathers...but that didn't make sense. He was in a field of flowers, he shouldn't be hearing footsteps on wooden boards! The footsteps stopped, and he heard a voice...his name was said, as though the speaker was in anguish. "...Adam..." he stirred at his name, but it was just so comfortable to be where he was...

Somewhere off to his left he heard the rustle of a woman's skirt through the flowers, the soft snap of stems and the thump as the heavy heads hit the ground. He wanted to stand, but he already knew who it was. This flower field and thick fragrance only appeared in his dreams when _she_ was here. _She_ knelt down next to him, her hair falling across her shoulders as she stared him in the eyes, a bright smile on her face, "Vanessa's a beautiful girl, Adam. She'll make a wonderful wife." it was _her,_ his mother. "Mother?" she nodded, smiled and put a hand on his chest, "What are you doing here, my son? Shouldn't you be fighting for Vanessa?" His shoulder suddenly felt as though someone had rammed it with a branding iron, and he groaned. "Don't darling," she reached down and gripped his hand, "Don't fight it."

----------

Maria held Adam's hand as the doctor began to dig the bullet out of Adam's shoulder. The man that Vanessa loved threw back his head, groaning. "Easy, boy, easy." she whispered, putting a cool cloth to his forehead and wiping at the sweat. His breathing was becoming shallow and uneven, something that Maria knew was a frightening precursor to death.

----------

"My shoulder, mother...it's my shoulder. It feel like a hot pokers running through it." Adam groaned, tightening his grip on his mother's hand. "I'm not surprised, my son. You were shot in the shoulder, they've got to get that bullet out of you." his mother's voice was so calming, so nice to hear.

"_Please let Adam be okay, God. Let him be okay and let me get out of this mess...Please, Lord. I'm begging you."_

It was Vanessa's voice, tears thickening it. Adam tried to turn his head to assure her, let her know that it would all be okay. But his mother had such a grip on his hand, and she was so calm...so warm. _"Adam..." _Fear replaced the tears, _"Please, Adam..."_ Her voice was growing insistent, and Adam wanted dearly to turn over to her, but his mothers grip on him was tight. "Adam, if you return to her..." the voice, along with the figure talking to him, changed to his father, "How do you know that she'll still want you? After all, you were the one who walked out on her..." Adam shook his head, "I know Pa, but I have to try."

----------

"She was...is...most...beautiful..." he grumbled, tossing in the fever that had caught up to him. Elizabeth wiped at the sweat on Adam's brow, dosing the cloth in the cold water basin next to her before he went back to it.

It had been two days since they'd put Adam in the bed in his and Vanessa's hotel room. Elizabeth had been sitting here ever since, telling herself that her cousin would be alright. Ben had waited only long enough for the bullet to be removed before he let her talk him into searching for Vanessa. "Someone has to find her, Mr Cartwright. Go, find my cousin." The doctor had gotten the bleeding to stop, but Adam's breathing was still labored, as though he was fighting off the very gates of heaven to stay. Maria came in, followed by Aunt Sarah, Elizabeth looked up at them and smiled faintly. Maria sat across from her, setting a fresh basin of water on the bedstand next to herself, "How is he?" she whispered, taking some fresh rags from Sarah before taking over the washing of his face. Elizabeth stood, stretching the muscles in her back, "He's feverish, but he's not overly warm. It's almost as though there's something holding him back." She folded her arms and sat on her cousins trunk and took a deep breath, "it's times like these that I wish Vanessa was here." Maria smiled grimly, "or had her knowledge about those herbs of hers."

Sarah grinned widely then, "Well then, I guess it's a good thing that I helped her make this," she removed a small jar from the basket she carried and took Elizabeth's seat, "When we made it, I asked her about it and she said it would help lower a fever real quick like." Maria reached across the groaning man and grabbed Sarah's arm, "She didn't happen to tell you what to do with that, did she?"

----------

Adam stared at his father, and repeated the words that he'd already said to his father, "If you could only understand, I was so...taken with what Vanessa was that all I could really think of was having her for myself...even if it meant having someone else in her place." The suddenly his father's understanding look changed into Nicholas, Vanessa's father, and he grabbed Adam by the throat, "You're ignoring my girl." he growled, "My girl needs you and you're not following the man that took her!"

----------

Maria rubbed the cooling salve onto Adam's chest, her hands running high onto his throat. It had only taken them a moment to figure out what the salve did, and Maria had been regulated to spreading it on his torso and arms, the quickest way to lower that fever. Elizabeth blushed as Maria's experienced hands drifted lower on Adam's body, lowering the thin sheet they had over him, and turned away as Maria tossed the sheet back and spread the salve on his legs.

----------

Nicholas's eyes were a fearsome red, his face a mask of anger. Adam reached up for the hand at his throat, and found it occupied already. He looked down at it, and found himself standing on the bluff above the lake on the Ponderosa, the great blue expanse stretching before him...and Vanessa. She was kneeling there next to him, her hands clinging to his left for dear life, and praying her heart out, _"Please, Please bring him back to me...please."_ She looked up at him; tears were rolling down her cheeks as she continued to speak, _"Adam please, if you can hear me please...please come back to me. I've lost so much in this life, don't make me lose you too."_ Nicholas was gone, his father was gone, his mother was gone, all that existed was he and her...and her tears begging for his return.

"Nessa..." he groaned, turning his head to the side, and slowly opening his eyes, "Nessa please don't cry."

----------

Maria gasped in shock as Adam's eyes opened, and he spoke. His voice was dry and cracked under the strain, but she heard it clear as day in the silent room, "Nessa...Nessa please don't cry." He blinked, his vision cleared, and he wrinkled his brow, "Maria? Where's..." he tried to sit up but Maria pressed him back down in the bed, "You stay put. You've just broken out of an odd fever and I want to make sure that shoulder of yours is in place before you move anything." Adam set his jaw and sat up, pain searing through his shoulder as he moved, but up he went and glowered at Maria, "Get me a rag to wipe this off with and then get me my clothes." his eyes turned to Sarah, "Which way did my father go?" Sarah swallowed, her eyes taking in the youthful magnificence of his body as he cleaned himself off, then said, "How do you know he's not still in town?"

Adam smirked, "If my father was still in town, he'd be sitting right where you are. Now, where did he go?" Sarah was still stubborn as he stood and fastened his pants and let Maria help his left arm into the sleeve, "Who said he went anywhere? He could be just downstairs..." Adam glared at the old woman and allowed Maria to put his arm into a sling to hold his shoulder easier, then fasten the buttons to hold it tight. "That's something that Vanessa learned about us Cartwrights that you've yet to, you mess with one Cartwright, you mess with us all." he smirked, and grabbed up his gunbelt. Holding it in his good hand, he glanced again at Maria, "You said I'd have to trust you..." Maria smiled warmly, and set the belt around his hips as Adam held it where he could grab his gun easily. Once finished, Maria looked into his eyes, "You go save my girl, Adam Cartwright, then you take her home to that Ponderosa of yours and give her all the children she could ever want." Adam raised an eyebrow, "What do you think I was trying to do?" Elizabeth gasped and turned back to stare at him, "Adam Cartwright, I can't believe you would talk about such things!" Adam smirked and chucked the young girls chin, "If you thought that was bad, you should hear some of the things I have come from Vanessa's mouth."

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Vanessa's arms hurt something terrible, and made her want to scream, but if she screamed he'd come back, and she didn't want that either. They'd driven in the wagon for several hours before he stopped them, and had taken her, now blindfolded so as not to let her escape into a place that felt cold and wet. She been tossed on the ground, hard as stone, and the wall behind her back was cold beneath her clothes. He'd bound her wrists tightly and then shackled them to the wall so that she couldn't move without fire burning through her muscles and her wrists felt raw. She shifted slightly, and felt something warm run down her right arm...blood. _'Great,' _she thought to herself, leaning her head back against the wall, _'now I'm bleeding. I doubt my arms will be of much use when I finally get out of this...'_ she shook her head and banished the hurt that would come if she continued down that trail. Adam...she offered up another silent prayer that Ben had gotten to him in time, and that he was okay.

She didn't know how much time had passed since she'd been brought here, but it felt like forever. She hadn't eaten since before her marriage ceremony, and now her stomach grumbled angrily. She felt dizzy from lack of food, but at least someone brought her a glass of water every so often. She shifted her legs, feeling the reassuring feel of the rock she'd hidden away from her last excursion to use the necessities.

Footsteps...heavy breathing...a grunt as something heavy was moved aside...the grinding of stone...she was in a mausoleum? Her breath started coming quicker and her heart started pounding, she hated mausoleums, hated them about as much as Hades used to hate male riders. The stench, the cold that would creep into her bones, the absolute lack of life, of sunlight. The footsteps got closer, and she held her breath, waiting for the slap that come every time he came to check on her. A hand brushed against her cheek and she inhaled sharply, jerking her head away. "Easy girl...easy."

It was Ranger, just as she feared it would be. His hands moved from her face and dropped to her bruised shoulders, "I hope your not hurting too much." she heard him draw a breath, then click his tongue at her. "Aw now, will you look at that. You've gone and hurt yourself." She felt his fingers trace the blood trail on her arm, "We'll just have to get you cleaned up, you've got an appearance to make." His hands moved away from her, then she felt them move across the shackles on her wrists. She hissed as her arms fell onto her lap, she could feel the pain start in her shoulders as grabbed her under her armpits and hefted her to her feet.

She knew she wouldn't have a lot of power, but she had to try.

"There we go, Vanessa." Ranger looked at her face, and frowned to himself. He hadn't meant to give her those hits earlier, but the damn woman couldn't stop crying; even now tears leaked from beneath the blindfold, and he knew that if he removed the dirty rag, her eyes would be bright red from it. Shaking his head, he bent and fell to the floor.

Vanessa had waited until he bent to lift her onto his shoulders, and then she brought her throbbing hands up, gripping the stone she'd hidden and crashed them down against his neck. She heard him grunt, and took several fast steps away from him. As she moved, she tore the rag from her eyes and kept running.

Then she tripped on her long skirts on the stairs outside.

----------

Ben reined in his rented horse, and looked around him. The terrain was certainly that much different then what it had been the last time he and one of his boys had been here. He glanced at the great burly man beside him and shook his head, "Any idea where he might have gone?" Black Arrow looked around also, and grimaced, "I really don't." Off to their left was a cemetery, the multitude of mausoleums and grave markers looking like a miniature city in the setting sun. Ben was about to nudge his horse forward when Black Arrow reached over and grabbed his arm, "Did you hear that?" Ben shook his head, listening carefully. Black Arrow looked behind them, then off to their right, where the road forked. There was a horse and rider coming up on them fast, with hat pulled low over his eyes and left arm in a sling. Ben blew out his breath as Adam met up with them, "Boy, you should be in bed resting that shoulder." Adam shook his head at his father, "I'd rather be in bed with my wife, and that's not going to happen until she's found." Ben couldn't help the smirk that flashed across his face, and Adam kept talking, "Black Arrow." he nodded to Vanessa's brother, and the Indian nodded back, "We've eliminated most of the city by now. The only thing left is this cemetery, but if Vanessa's in there, she's keeping real quiet about it."

Ben's brow creased, "Why do you say that?" Black Arrow turned back to Ben, glancing at Adam as he explained, "All her life, Vanessa's _**hated**_ them. She says they have the feel of death in them." He looked back at the cemetery, beyond the markers to the great family mausoleums in the background, "I'd just bet... Come on." he nudged his horse forward and turned into the cemetery.

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Vanessa rolled at the bottom of the stairs, and groaned. She'd just been locked up for too long. Taking a quick breath, she tried to push herself up onto her hands and knees, but her arms just weren't strong enough. Whimpering at her own helplessness, she flipped onto her back, and blinked to clear them. Vanessa knew that Ranger would be moving around soon, she hadn't hit him that hard, and if he wasn't already on his way out, he soon would be....and fighting mad to boot. She rolled back onto her belly, and used her left arm to help herself to her knees, holding her right tight into her body.

Once on her feet, she glanced around and found herself exactly where she never wanted to be as a live person, a cemetery. Drawing a shuddering breath, she took a small step forward and almost fell back onto her knees. _'Okay...easy girl. You aren't up to your old strength yet.'_ she knew it was from lack of food, but she didn't have time to find anything...and she doubted there was much she could find in a cemetery. She shuddered and took another step, then another, and another. Before long she was moving away from the mausoleum and deeper into the darkening cemetery.

"I hate cemeteries." she grumbled to herself, falling to her knees near a small headstone. She maneuvered to sit on her back side, and tucked her legs underneath herself. There was just enough light left for her to examine her arm, and she pulled it out to look it over. Her wrists was red and scratched raw, she swallowed and grabbed for the hem of her nightgown beneath her dress. Tearing away a few strips, she wrapped it around her wrist, tying it with her teeth. It wasn't much, but it would fend off an infection, at least until she could wash it with one of her rinses. She'd done it o many times for the hands back home or even some of the girls here in New Orleans when they'd broken skin on something, but never on herself. She bit her lip, remembering what she'd always told her patient, _"It's going to hurt like hell."_ 'Yes, Vanessa. This is going to hurt like hell alright, but you're away from Ranger now.'

It was a small blessing. Leaning back on the stone, she braced herself with her good arm, and found her hand in a patch of something...with black leaves. She brought her hand back quick, wiping it feverishly on her skirt. Her curiosity took over, and she leaned closer, straining to see if...there, there they were.

Berries, black as midnight.


	13. Rescue

She'd only need a few, just enough to knock him unconscious...or herself. The thought was quickly followed by the chastising voice of her mother, _"Nessa, child, nothing is more valuable than life. It's the one thing that when it's taken away, can't be given back. You remember that, my little dove. There comes a time when everyone has to make that choice, Nessa, to give or take life. I want you to promise me something right now, before I teach you anything more, that you will never take life, never even if your own life depended on it."_ Vanessa had been a child of seven years old when her mother had made her make that promise, and now, fifteen years later it looked as though she would have to make that choice. Five would make him violently ill, seven to eight would knock him unconscious...but ten could kill him. She opened her palm and counted how many she'd removed while she'd thought things through.

Ten...exactly ten berries. She swallowed, closed her fingers around the spoils and leaned away from the plant.

Ten could kill him...and she could get away clean.

Ten could kill him...and she and Adam would be able to go away from here safely...if Adam was okay.

Ten could kill him...and leave an innocent child fatherless.

There it was, her choice. Could she do this? Could she break a promise to her mother made all those years ago, before she even knew what love was...or that she loved Adam Cartwright. Adam...her breath caught in her throat as she remembered the last sight she had of her husband. She leaned her head back on the headstone, hands in her lap and berries spilling onto her skirt. Her husband could be dead for all she knew, she didn't even know what day it was or how long she'd been kept away from the world.

In a mausoleum.

The thought made her shiver all over and she shook her head to clear it. Night had set it now, and she was sure her voice would carry. But she had to calm down, had to think straight. She started humming first, then as the song continued she opened her mouth, and sang softly, her voice growing stronger as it came to an end. There was a breeze that disturbed the leaves of the oak in the distance, but nothing else that she could decipher.

So she began again, her father's lullaby.

----------

It was getting darker, and the men had to get down from their horses for fear of stepping in a hole. It felt as though there was a definite change in the air when they entered the cemetery, but Adam shook it off as the normal shivers one got from walking into such a revered place. After all, people were laid to their final rest here. He just hoped that his new wife wasn't one of them. Tying their horses off near a tree, Black Arrow led them deeper into the darkening graveyard, and Adam lifted his head as a sound caressed his ears.

"_Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high, there's a land that I heard of, once in a lullaby."_

His ears perked, just like his horse's, and he glanced at Arrow, "Did you hear that?" Arrow glanced around them, "Sounds a fair ways off, she must be on the other side of this." he kicked his foot on the ground. "Let's move!" Adam said, gripping his gun tight and stalking forward. It was slow going, the breeze was working against them, and carried her soft voice away. They had to stop when they couldn't hear her anymore, and it grated on Adam's nerves like nothing he'd experienced before. He should have been happy that she was singing, it at least meant that she was okay, not to terribly injured...or maybe she was, and this was the only way she could have someone find her. The breeze died down and there she was again, _"Where troubles melt like lemon drops, a way above the chimney tops that's where you'll find me."_ Adam pointed to the mausoleums, and Arrow nodded. "We'd best split up to find her better." Arrow suggested, and the two Cartwrights agreed.

Adam went left, making a wide circle towards a tall oak tree that he could just make out in the waning moonlight. Ben went right, taking careful steps to weave through the burial sites. Arrow continued forward, kneeling to grab his throwing knife from its sheath, and kept low to the ground, his Paiute upbringing kicking in.

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Vanessa stopped singing, she heard footsteps coming closer. In the almost blackness of the cemetery, she couldn't tell if they were friendly or not. The berries in her lap weighed heavy against her thighs, reminding her of the decision she still hadn't quite made. The footsteps stopped, as though they'd been listening to her voice. 'Stupid!' she harassed herself, quickly getting to her feet, gripping the berries into a loose fist. 'You've led him right to you!'

"You know, Vanessa. You're a very hard woman to find." Ranger grit his teeth and walked forward, his gun drawn and pointed at the witches chest. One hand was tightened into a fist, and he brought up his other hand for it. "What's that you've got there?"

This was it, what she said next would keep or break her promise to her mother.

She looked down at her fist, opened it and offered it palm up to him, "I got hungry, I haven't eaten in so long..." he looked hard at her palm, but couldn't quite tell what they were. His stomach growled, and he stepped forward, reaching for the berries in her hand. "Well, if you've eaten them, then I suppose they're alright." She fought hard to keep her face calm as he removed every last berry from her hand, and stuffed them all in his mouth.

But she couldn't help the roiling that started in her stomach.

A few moments passed, with the two of them just standing there. Vanessa was watching the gun in his hand, never wavering, while Ranger watched the witch standing before him, her chest rising and falling as though she was expecting something...something...

Something was happening to him. His gut felt as though he'd swallowed a rock, and was rejecting it. He swallowed a few times, but it only made it worse, and soon he found himself doubled over, retching. His body was shaking feverishly, and he fell to the ground. "You....you did this!" he growled, struggling to his feet. She backed away slowly, her eyes wide with fear. He retched again and hit his knees hard, "You...you witch!" his voice rose, but he couldn't see anything. His hands flew to his face, and he waved them in front of his eyes, "Blind...I'm blind!"

Ranger was crawling towards her, but she moved quicker, staying just out of his reach. "Witch!" he shouted, though at this point it was more of a hoarse whisper, "Witch, you've killed me!" he fell forward, one hand outstretched for her skirt. She clutched her skirt up in her hands, her breath coming fast and her heart pounding. She couldn't stand any longer, and fell to her knees, taking deep gasping breaths as tears poured down her cheeks.

----------

Adam was only a few yards away from the oak when she stopped singing, and he had to stop moving himself. 'Damn it, girl! Say something...anything.' he thought angrily, adjusting his grip on the gun in his hand. Then he heard voices...A man's...then Nessa gave a strangled cry. He hedged forward, reaching the oak tree and leaned against it with his good shoulder. All this moving around couldn't be good for him, but he had to get Vanessa back safe.

Then he'd lay around and heal.

The men had found the mausoleums, one of which had the door swung wide open. Arrow had snuck inside, then emerged quickly, his face grim. "What is it?" Ben asked, his eyes sweeping the area around them. Arrow spat, something he never did, and growled angrily, "It's a regular old mausoleum, but inside there are a set of shackles bolted into the far wall. Vanessa was here alright." Ben drew a breath, "But where is she now?" Vanessa's voice echoed across the graveyard, getting the attention of both Arrow and Ben, and Arrow pointed towards the sound, "I'd say that answers your question."

----------

Adam holstered his gun, and walked quickly forward to his sobbing wife. He dropped to his knees next to her, and wrapped his good arm around her, "Nessa..." she shuddered and looked up at him, "Adam?" she brought a hand up to his face, "Adam, tell me my eyes aren't playing tricks on me." he brought his injured arm forward, putting a finger under her chin and kissed her passionately. His arm across her back tightened, and she gasped in agony. "Ugh." she pulled away from him, wincing as she moved.

Ben and Arrow arrived as Adam shifted her around, and looked at her face. "Nessa, what happened?" She was still sobbing, trying hard to get control over herself, "I...he..." Adam didn't need to hear any more and released his grip on her chin. Just pulled her in close and held her as tight as he could without hurting her. Nessa buried her head in his good shoulder, her back quivering as she continued to weep. Arrow went to the body before the couple, and knelt to check for life. His black eyes flicked to Adam, who was watching him closely. "He's dead..." Vanessa shuddered and kept on crying, but Adam, in his cold, hard logic, lifted her chin again and looked into her eyes. "Nessa, tell me what happened."

She swallowed hard, and shook her head, "I broke a promise." Arrow sucked in his breath through his teeth, making the two male Cartwrights look at him. "What is it?" Ben asked the man, but it was Vanessa that spoke, "Belladonna." Both Adam and Ben were confused, and Arrow explained, "Belladonna berries! You gave this man Belladonna berries?!" He was in shock, Vanessa....his little sister gave a man something that she knew would kill him? Vanessa looked so sad, her eyes turning a very silver grey, "Arrow...I...I had no choice...he was...he was going to...I thought...I thought he'd killed..." she buried her head again into Adam's shoulder and continued to weep.

Adam gave Arrow a fierce glare, "What's belladonna?" he asked, helping Vanessa stand. She wrapped her arms around his waist, turning her back to Arrow and the body on the ground. Arrow watched Vanessa's back for a moment then spoke. "You'd better know it as Deadly Nightshade." Ben drew a sharp breath, his eyes roving to his daughter in law, "Let's get her out of here." he said to his son, and waited as Adam walked Vanessa towards him.

----------

It was almost dawn by the time they reached Aunt Sarah's, and Vanessa was nestled against Arrow's chest as they rode into the back corral. Adam was right behind him, reining in his own rented horse and dismounting before Vanessa could even think about moving. He may have lost the argument about having ride with him, but he wasn't about to let anyone else walk her inside. Vanessa slipped from Titan's back, her arms wrapping again around Adam's waist. She didn't want to let him go...not for a good long time. The back door banged open, revealing Sarah and Elizabeth as they tore from the house to get to Vanessa. "Vanessa! Oh, Vanessa darling." Sarah cooed, grabbing Vanessa up into a tight hug. "I'm fine, Aunt Sarah..." she grunted as Sarah's hands ran over her sore back muscles. Sarah grabbed her nieces hands and stared at the bandaged wrists, "Alright my fanny, Nessa. You're bleeding!" Nessa shook her head, "It's nothing Sarah. I just need to..." she stumbled, and Adam was quick to grip her waist. "She needs to lay down, Widow Governs." Sarah nodded and took Vanessa's hand, leading her inside.

They barely made it to the small kitchen table before Vanessa stumbled again, and collapsed onto one of the wooden chairs. Elizabeth hustled around the kitchen, pouring a dried mix of something into a pot of water she had simmering on the fire, and pushed it deeper into the flames to get it boiling. "Vanessa you stay right there, chamomile right?" Vanessa nodded absently, letting Sarah untie the bandages on her wrists. Adam sat across from Vanessa, his eyes glued to what Sarah was doing. Here in the harsh lamplight of the kitchen, Vanessa was sure it would look a lot worse than it was, but when the last wrap fell away, even she couldn't stop the hiss that escaped her lips.

The skin had been rubbed clean away, blood having come and dried over the scabs several times. The fresh wound on her right wrist was still raw, and when the air hit it, she instinctively flinched. Sarah tightened her grip on her hand and looked into her niece's face, "Nessa, dear. Where's that rinse you use?" Vanessa closed her eyes, "It's in the right cupboard. In a glass jar." Sarah nodded to Elizabeth, who brought over a glass of the tea she'd been brewing while Sarah stood to retrieve the rinse. Vanessa swallowed the tea greedily and handed the glass back to Elizabeth, "Add two spoonfuls of cinnamon then stir it fast, just be careful to not let any spill." It sounded mechanical, as though it was something she always had said to Elizabeth. The girl smiled, and set another full glass next to her cousin, "I already did."

Sarah sat back down next to her niece, the jar now in one hand and an empty bowl in the other. "Alright, Vanessa. Let me see those wrists of yours." Vanessa bit her lip, and glanced at Adam. "I don't think you're going to want to be in here." Sarah said, watching her nieces gaze. Adam shook his head, and moved to sit on the other side of Vanessa, "I'm not letting her out of my sight, not yet." He wanted to hold her hand, but the injuries on her wrists stopped him. It made his blood boil to think that Ranger had done this to his wife, tied her up and kept her in a house of the dead. His father had told him how they had found the shackles in the mausoleum, and how Arrow had no doubt that that was where he had been keeping Vanessa.

Sarah gently lifted one of Vanessa's wrists over the bowl, and the girl lifted the other, "Just get it over and done with, Aunt Sarah." she said, her voice hollow. Sarah opened the jar, and was about to pour it over Vanessa's skin when she stopped and said, "This is..."

"Gonna hurt like hell." Vanessa finished, biting down on her lip. Sarah smiled grimly and poured the fluid over the open wounds. Vanessa stiffened as the liquid hit her skin, then relaxed a bit when it stopped. She watched her aunt pick up the soft rag she'd brought with her, and soak it in the rinse before dabbing a corner of it on the red skin. Vanessa's jaw clenched, the her eyes closed tight. Her breath was coming quick and Adam could tell that she was trying hard to not cry out in pain. He scooted his chair closer and place his good hand on her shoulder, trying to reassure her. She looked over at him, anything to take her concentration off from what was happening to her wrists. Sarah looked up from her ministrations, took a quick second to think, then said, "Kiss her Adam." Adam glanced around Vanessa to the older woman, "What good will that do?" Sarah smirked, and lifted the half full jar into his line of sight, "I've got to finish washing these wounds of hers, and now that most of the loose skin is gone, she's going to need something to distract her."

Adam glanced up at his father and Arrow, who moved out of the kitchen to give them at least that much privacy. Elizabeth remained by the fire, her back now turned to them as she busied herself with what was left of the tea. His gaze returned to Vanessa, who was now staring at his open shirt, then crooked a finger under her chin, raising her face and lowered his lips to hers.

It was the same sweetness from before, but it was tempered by the salt of her tears. He brought a hand around her neck, cradling it in a gentle grip, his fingers gathering the loose strands and pulled her head back, opening her mouth further to him. He could tell she was just beginning to enjoy it, he himself was having trouble not pulling her tight against his body and holding her there for the rest of eternity, but the pain in his left shoulder and the fact that when he'd grabbed her earlier she'd cried out, made him stop.

Then Sarah poured the rinse.

The spell was broken, Vanessa let out a muffled scream into his mouth and pulled her head away from him, painful tears rolling down her cheeks. Vanessa took shaky breaths trying to stop her lips from trembling and ignore the pain in her wrists. When Sarah stopped the liquid, Vanessa drew a deep breath, and looked to her aunt, "Aunt Sarah, if I ever suggest using that on anyone else again, shoot me." Sarah smiled and stood, wrapping her arms around her niece's shoulders, "Oh Nessa, sweetheart." Before Sarah lost herself in mothering her, Vanessa opened her mouth, "Lizzie, I'm gonna need some fresh wrappings for these wrists of mine." As Elizabeth began to move around behind her, Vanessa looked at her aunt, "That garlic mash I made last week, it should still be good. It's in the gray..." Sarah waved her down, "I know where it is. What are you thinking about?" she asked, standing to grab the container Vanessa needed. Elizabeth brought the strips of cloth and set them on the table next to Adam. Vanessa looked at him, a serious look on her face, "Now, get those wrappings good and soaked in that mash, then help Aunt here get them tied back around these." she lifted her wrists slightly as she spoke.

Sarah brought another bowl with her, and dumped all of the garlic mash into it. Sarah looked at Adam, and smiled gently, "I'd suggest you do as your told boy. Your Vanessa knows her stuff." Vanessa smirked, but it was an empty one. There was a hollow look in her eyes, a hollow sound to her voice, and when he'd kissed her she'd attacked him like a drowning woman. He knew that feeling...he'd had it the first time he'd had to draw against someone. His girl wasn't so innocent anymore, not now that she'd had to kill someone. As Adam dunked the wrappings, he set his jaw and handed them to Sarah, who began wrapping Vanessa's wrists. She started below the raw sections of skin, and continued up and over her thumb then continued back down. Once Nessa was satisfied with them, she nodded to Sarah and placed her hands in her lap, making sure she could still move her fingers.

Elizabeth set another warm glass of tea in front of her, but Nessa made no move to touch it. Elizabeth patted her shoulder then kissed her gently on the top of her head, "Good-night, Nessa. You get some sleep." Elizabeth waited for Nessa to return her squeeze, but instead the older cousin just sat in her chair flanked by her husband and staring at the table in front of her. Adam put a hand on Vanessa's thigh, and whispered, "Come on...let's get some sleep." Vanessa shook her head, "If I close my eyes all I'm going to see is his body, convulsing on the ground in front of me." She stood suddenly and went to one of the large windows that Sarah had overlooking the porch and back yard. She crossed her arms, wincing at the sharp pain in her wrists as she did so. She heard Adam blow out his breath, then come to stand behind her, putting his good arm around her shoulders, "Nessa..." she shook her head, "No, Adam." she sighed and looked up at him, putting a hand on his chest, "You go on up, I'll be in in a few moments. My...our room's the third door on the left." She tilted her head towards the door and tried to smile at him.

For the first time in two years, she knew it didn't reach her eyes.

He moved his hand to stroke her cheek with his fingers, "Don't you be lying to me." her lips curled again, but it wasn't a smile...it wasn't even a smirk. Adam lifted the corner of his mouth, trying to give her some hope that it wasn't all going to be that bad, then left her alone with her thoughts.

----------

Black Arrow watched as Adam headed down the hall for the room he knew belonged to Vanessa, then left his guest room to go back to his sister. As his foot hit the third step from the bottom, he heard a great squeak as the wood bent beneath his weight. Shaking his head, Arrow kept moving and made his way into the kitchen. Vanessa had moved to sitting before the great fire, now not much more than embers. The lamp had been blown out and she sat in relative darkness. Arrow shook his head, grabbed a chair and plopped down next to her, straddling the back as he watched her.

She swallowed, then spoke, "I've done something terrible, Arrow. I don't think you can make it right like you have before." Arrow didn't answer, he more than anyone, maybe even that new husband of hers, knew that when Vanessa got into one of these melancholies, the best thing to do was let her talk it out. She sighed, "When I was maybe seven years old, no more than eight, my mother began teaching me about these herbs." she glanced at her wrists and continued, "She'd told me about the differences in telling which one should stew, simmer into a tea, make into a mash or paste when I asked her if there were any that could kill." She leaned forward on her elbows, "Before she told me anything, she made me promise to never use my knowledge to take a life. Never...not even if my life depended on it. _Life's the one gift that can't be given back once it's taken away,_ she said. All her life long, my mother helped bring lives into this world, help the passing of those leaving and continue the lives of those injured, and as far as I know she never had to make the choice I did tonight." she dropped her head and let the tears roll again, "I killed a man tonight...a man with a four year old boy."

As she drew a shuddering breath, Arrow reached out and put a hand on her back, "Vanessa, the name of that man that took you, was it Kirkpatrick?" she nodded, wiping her face. Arrow nodded and continued, "There's something I need to show you." he gripped her arm and lifted to her feet. She looked up at him, confused. "What are you..." she didn't get a chance to finish the sentence as he led her down the back steps and out to where Titan waited. He lifted her onto the saddle, then threw himself up behind her. "Where are we going?" she asked, but he just put an arm around her to steady her then nudged the great animal into a full gallop.

They tore off through side roads, avoiding any crowds he saw in the distance, and before too long were again outside the graveyard. Arrow felt her shiver next to him, "I knew there was a reason why I hated cemeteries." she muttered, absently rubbing at her wrists. He chuckled then cussed Titan forward, and the horse picked his way through to the great family mausoleums at the back of the cemetery. Vanessa looked around her, half hoping to see Rangers dead body lying on the ground again, just to prove to herself that it wasn't the bad dream the other half of her prayed it all was. Ranger stopped Titan's movement, and looked at the great building they were sitting in front of. "Look." he pointed to the top of the doorway, and Vanessa gasped.

Kirkpatrick

"This is where he kept you for the last two days." Arrow dismounted and turned back to her, "Now I'm gonna ask you to come inside with me. Think you can do that?" Vanessa looked again at the name above the door, then nodded slowly. She braced her hands against his shoulders and let him lift her down. Arrow took her hand and led her into the building, letting her pause at the doorway. He watched her take a deep breath and step inside, closing her eyes as the cool darkness washed over her. She fought down memories, memories of being dragged in here, her heart racing and tears flowing as she tried to remember if Adam had moved at all, terrified that he hadn't and that he had died as she was being taken bodily away from him. Arrow took her hand, and whispered, "I'm right here. You'll be alright." She opened her eyes, and nodded to him, taking up the remains of her skirt and followed him.

There, about half way up the far wall were the shackles that had held her, but just above them was a name and the dates of birth and death....

Gabrielle Kirkpatrick

but it wasn't that name that caught Vanessa's attention. Beside Gabrielle's resting place was another, smaller plaque, inscribed with a name she'd thought wouldn't be here for a long time.

Matthew Kirkpatrick

Arrow watched her walk forward and run her fingers over the indentations of the letters, "He died when his mother did, of that same fever." She looked over her shoulder at him, "Then all this time...whenever he talked about Matthew..." Arrow nodded, "He was making it up." He walked over to her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, "So you see, you didn't orphan anyone. You simply allowed a very sick and troubled man meet his maker that much sooner." She shook her head, "I shouldn't have done it. I should have told him what those berries were. It's different when you draw a weapon on a man. He know what danger he's in, but with me..." Arrow pulled her into a tight hug, "Now stop that." he grumbled, "Don't you dare start working yourself up over a man that isn't worth half the one you married." Vanessa looked up at him, "But I..." he put a finger over her lips, "I'm your older brother ain't I?" she nodded, "Alright then. If I'm your older brother and I say you didn't kill nobody for no good reason, then you didn't, right?" She nodded again, but the look in her eyes made him rethink what he'd just said.

He sighed, "Come on. Let's get you into that bed of yours and then I'm going to make sure that you and your man get home to that Ponderosa you told me so much about." She smiled then, but that hollow look was still in her eyes. He walked her back outside, and was about to put her up on Titan again when a voice came from the next mausoleum over.

"Jenny! Oh Jenny I've got some of the best news! You know that Ranger Kirkpatrick that you used to run around with? Well someone's gone and given him his comeuppance! Yes, Jenny, that's right, the man that murdered you has finally meet his match, and is dancing with the devil as we speak." Vanessa looked up at Arrow, and the great man smiled at her, "There's lots you didn't know about that man, Nessa. A whole lot." He hefted her up into the saddle, and climbed up behind her. "Like I said, you need some sleep."

Vanessa grabbed his arms as they slid around her, and she whispered, "Thank you, Arrow. Thank you so much." She leaned against him, and let him take her back to Sarah's house.

----------

They were going to take the train to St. Louis then the stage lines back to Virginia City. It was a trek that would take about two weeks but Adam knew that those two weeks would feel so much longer. Vanessa watched as Ben and Arrow helped load their luggage onto the train. She wore a deep green travel dress with white lace that framed her shoulders, Sarah had convinced her to pile her hair up on her head, and tied a hat over it. She looked the vision in that color, and she knew that Adam was having trouble keeping his eyes off from her. She stood close to him, letting his newly freed arm wind its way around her waist and pull her against him. Adam lowered his mouth to her ear, "Are you happy?" She smiled, a genuine smile that lit up her whole face. "Why shouldn't I be? I'm headed back home." He grinned, "Now wait a minute here, isn't there something you're forgetting?" She put a finger to her pursed lips, and raised an eyebrow, "Well yes, there does seem to be a few things..." She pointed to Ben as he walked over to them, "That man there's now my father in law and he's got two great boys that are now my brothers. And he's got this big ranch, you see, and I can't wait to get on my horse and see the shore of Lake Tahoe again." Adam's smile faltered and he put his hands on his hips, "Anything else?" She smiled again, and turned to face him, "No...I don't think so..." she giggled as he fake glared at her, and squealed as he grabbed her up into a tight twirling hug, "Now you listen here, Mrs Cartwright..." he began, but stopped as his father got closer, his own boisterous laugh booming across the almost empty platform.

"Now, Adam. You too aren't going to go back to fighting each other are you?" Vanessa laughed heartily and laid her head against Adam's chest, "Oh no, Ben. Not when I've finally won the argument!" All three of them laughed as the trains whistle blew and the conductor began taking tickets. Ben walked away as Sarah and Elizabeth came forward to say their good-byes to Vanessa. "Oh my little Nessa." Sarah bawled, gripping the girl into a tight hug. "Now you take care of yourself out there, I don't want to see you on my front stoop crying your eyes out again." Vanessa smiled and stepped back from the older woman, "Thank you, Aunt Sarah. For everything." she wiped a tear from the woman's cheek, "Especially for writing this big oaf about my being here." Sarah's eyes widened innocently, "Now where did you get an idea like that?" Adam chuckled behind his wife, "She, uh, made me tell her." Sarah's eyes twinkled, "Well then, I'm glad you're happy about it." Vanessa smile seemed to brighten and she hugged her aunt again, "I am...so very much." Sarah stepped back and let Elizabeth come forward.

"Lizzie." Vanessa whispered, bringing the youth into her shoulder, "You remember what I taught you now, about those teas and things." Elizabeth nodded and smiled, "I'm going to miss you, Nessa." Vanessa hugged the girl tightly, "Alright now, don't you start, otherwise I'm going to cry myself." It was a tough battle that Elizabeth was losing, and Vanessa knew it. Shaking her head, she pushed to girl a ways a way and put her hands on her shoulders, "Now you listen me real good, Lizzie. I'm going to make you a deal, and I want you to take it." Elizabeth nodded, "Alright then...what is it?" Vanessa took a deep breath, "Come with me." Elizabeth took a sudden breath, "What?"

Adam shook his head, "I told you she wouldn't do it." Vanessa didn't break eye contact with her cousin, "I mean it, Lizzie. But there's one thing with it too. My best friend, Faith, she's living with her husband on that ranch that I once owned, I gave it to her and her husband as a wedding present. Anyway, she's expecting her first baby this winter, and I don't think I'm going to be able to go help her, and the last person alive I'd trust with Faith's baby is that doctor in Johnston." she glanced behind her at her husband then looked back at her cousin, "I want you to do me a favor. Go with me and then continue on to the Summerset ranch in California. I need you to be with her, Lizzie. Use that know how I taught you and help her as much as you can."

Elizabeth's face wrinkled, "But I haven't even packed anything." Vanessa smiled, "Why do you think I have four trunks going with me? I only had enough to fill two." the younger girls face brightened, and she ran to her aunt, "Oh, Aunt Sarah, did you hear?" Sarah was nodding before Elizabeth got to her, and the girl nearly yelped herself right off onto the tracks. "Now you get up on that train, you hear me?" Sarah swatted at Elizabeth's behind, and the girl climbed up next to Ben.

"Come on you two, or you're going to be left behind!" he shouted, making the two newlyweds move. Adam climbed on first, helping Vanessa. The train started to pull away from the station, and Vanessa waved farewell to her aunt.

Sarah waited until the train was out of sight before she turned to talk to the other woman that had come to see Vanessa and her family off. "Well Maria, they're gone...My last two projects. Now what am I going to do?" Maria, dressed in a black blouse and navy skirt, crossed her arms and smiled at the older woman, "Well...there are a few girls that I can't bring myself to bring into my house...maybe they could stay with you. Learn to become real ladies?" Sarah smiled, and took Maria by the arm and walked with her to the waiting buggy, "Maria, I think I just might be able to do that for you."


	14. Return Home

The stage was coming in today, and Virginia City was surprised to see both Cartwright boys come thundering into town, each with a wagon. Little Joe was first through, and parked near the livery stable, his brother Hoss pulling along side of him, "Well, we're here. Now where's that stage?" Hoss looked around, then got down out of the wagon. "It'll be here, now come on." Little Joe hopped down next to him, and straightened his jacket. They were both looking down that street, where they could just hear the incoming sounds of the stagecoach, a great jingle of leather, metal, wooden wheels and horse hooves. They hurried over to the stage office, reaching it just before the coach pulled in front of it.

----------

Vanessa leaned back against the rocking motions of the coach, her eyes glued to the countryside. Adam was seated next to her, his hand on her knee and the other across her shoulders, "Well now, what's got your tongue tied?" he asked, watching her face. She smiled, "Look at it, Adam. I'd almost forgotten how wonderful it all was." she chuckled under her breath, and turned to look at him, "How much further do we need to go?" he grinned and pulled her head closer, kissing her hair. "Not far...not far at all." Vanessa had changed at the last stage house, and was now wearing a navy skirt with a black button up shirt. Her hair was half up, braided against her head leaving a fair amount down around her shoulders.

Elizabeth sat across from Vanessa, with Ben next to her, and watched the whole thing. "Oh you two..." Vanessa laughed, and grabbed the edge of the open window, her face lighting up as the outer houses of Virginia City began to roll past. "What is it Lizzie, you worried you're going to be ignored when we reach the Ponderosa?" Vanessa raised an eyebrow at her cousin, a teasing glint in her eye. Elizabeth flushed and glared out the window, "Vanessa, I swear the things you say..." Adam laughed and hugged his bride that much tighter, "I warned you Elizabeth, you'd be shocked by some of the things that Vanessa says." Elizabeth glowered at him, "Whether I was warned or not, she shouldn't have said it." Vanessa just went back to looking out the window, then nearly jumped out of her seat, "There!" She turned back to Adam and kissed him soundly, "We're home!"

The stagecoach came to a halt in front of the office, and Ben was the first to disembark. Little Joe and Hoss pounced on him, "Well, what's she like?" Ben raised an eyebrow at his youngest, "She?" Hoss grinned, "Yeah, that little ol' gal that Adam dun an got himself married too!" Ben turned and helped Elizabeth down from the carriage, "Boys, this is Miss Elizabeth Jacobs. She'll be staying with us for a while before she continues on her journey." Adam came next, his face bright with a grin as he looked at his two confused brothers. "Well if this isn't the best welcoming committee I've ever seen." He said, letting Hoss lift him into a great bear hug. Little Joe was slapping him on the back as soon as his feet hit the ground, "Well it's about time, you old varmit. Now where is she?" Adam laughed, "Who?" Hoss rolled his eyes, "That little filly you got married to!"

"I think I can answer that." Vanessa said, stepping on the stool and waiting for Adam to take her hand. Both of the younger Cartwrights jaws dropped as they looked at their new sister. "Hello Hoss...Little Joe." she sounded scared, and she stepped into Adam's shoulder. Ben watched his two sons, then spoke, "Well boys? Aren't you going to say hello to your sister in law?"

Hoss moved first, stepping up to Vanessa and looking down his great barrel chest at her, "You mean to tell me that you two finally got hitched?" She nodded, smiling tentatively. Hoss's gentle face broke into a great smile and he bent, lifting Vanessa around the waist and spinning her in a few circles. "Well now, it's about time!" he said, hugging her tight to him before setting her on her feet again and letting Little Joe come forward. The youngest Cartwright looked carefully into her face, and put a hand under her chin, "May I kiss the bride?" Adam howled and put a hand on his younger brothers shoulder, "No. I'll be the one her kissing from now on." Vanessa giggled, "Now boys, please." She took Little Joe by the shoulders and kissed his cheek, "There. You satisfied?" Little Joe smiled, "Welcome to the family, Vanessa." Vanessa smiled, and hugged him.

----------

She'd done the math; she'd been between flows when she and Adam had made love in the cave, and in the two weeks while they were waiting for Adam's shoulder to heal was when she was supposed to have had it...but it hadn't come. She had thought about it then, but had decided to wait until she missed a second to be sure. After all, stress had made her skip a time before. But that second was supposed to have come just after their arrival at the Ponderosa, and when it didn't she'd gone running to Elizabeth.

"Lizzie!" she hollered, finding the girl in the nearest corral with a yearling Hoss was showing her. Vanessa stopped in her tracks, "Oh...Mornin' Hoss."She walked over to them, trying to keep her walk steady as always, but it was proving difficult. Her new brother raised an eyebrow at her, "Mornin', Vanessa. What's got you so riled up?" Vanessa swallowed, "Oh, nothing. I just need to talk to Lizzie is all...and it's kind of important." She held out her hand to her cousin, and nearly dragged the girl out of earshot of the barn and corral. "Nessa, what..." Vanessa put a hand over her mouth and whispered excitedly, "Lizzie, I think I'm pregnant." Elizabeth's eyes widened, but before she could react Vanessa grabbed her arm with her other hand, "Shush! I only said I think I am, I need to see the doctor to be sure. Now I know you can't really keep a secret, but please...just this once keep your mouth shut!"

Little Joe came out of the barn then, leading the wagon team. She saw him, and left Elizabeth standing in elated anger to run over to him, "Joe! Joe, are you heading into town?" Joe looked at her, "Yeah, I've got a few errands Hop Sing wants done..." she nodded, "Would you mind terribly if I tagged along with you?" Joe looked at her strangely, "Well, no I wouldn't mind...but I'm only going in to get the mail and pick up a few things." She waved it off, "That's fine, that's all I'm doing myself. I sent a telegram to my friend Faith about Elizabeth, and I just want to see if she's replied back yet." Joe shrugged, "All right, come along." Vanessa glanced over her shoulder at Hoss, then walked over to him, "Hoss, can you keep an eye on Lizzie for me? I'm picking up a few things for Adam's wedding present and I...well, I don't want her spilling the beans just yet." Hoss nodded, "Sure thing. Don't you worry about her." Hoss grinned, winked and returned to brushing the yearlings coat. Vanessa smiled and let Joe help her into the wagon, "Come on, let's get going."

It was a good ride, one that Vanessa knew that she needed, and she and Joe had a good chance to talk through a lot. Memories of their childhood summers together, the pranks they would play on Adam, and occasionally Hoss. The trouble they would get into with Hop Sing's kitchen, and with his mother...before she died. Then with Jennifer Warrick, before Adam went away to school and the Warricks stopped coming to the Ponderosa. "Why did you stop?" he asked as they approached the city outskirts. Vanessa adjusted in her seat, "I don't really know for sure. I do know that my father wasn't really keen on taking that trip with just me, especially when I was so young." Joe sniffed, "Young? You were elven years old." Vanessa smirked, "Eleven might seem not all that young for a boy, but with a girl...things are different..." She trailed off as they approached the general store, "Joe, is that Sport...there?" she pointed to the chestnut gelding tied off near the saloon. Joe nodded, "Sure looks like him...why?" She shook her head, "I thought he and Ben were off looking for strays..."

Joe smirked, he knew why Adam was here. His oldest brother had told him about Vanessa's talent with the piano, and how he was arranging to have one sent from New York for her. "It'll be great!" he'd told him as he'd saddled Sport up this morning, "But you be sure to keep it quiet." Joe intended to do just that, and now it seemed as though his brothers secret might be told without him having to open his mouth. "Hmm, maybe they came through for a drink then are gonna continue on, it's only eleven in the morning, Vanessa." Vanessa slid over to him, and let him lift her down, "Maybe...but if that's the case then where's Buck?" Joe swallowed, right. If his story was to hold any water, Pa needed to come down the street right now. Then Vanessa spoke again, "Hm, oh well. Maybe Ben's still out somewhere." Joe smiled, "You need any help with your stuff?" She shook her head, "No. I'll make out alright. Are you going to be around the store in, say, thirty to forty minutes?" Joe went over his mental list and shrugged, "I'll meet you there if I'm not."

"Alright. I'll see you then." she said, then glanced around the street, "Oh, um, Joe?" he stopped walking away from her, and looked over his shoulder, "Yes?" she hurried over to him, and whispered in his ear, "Which way to the doctor?" Joe turned back to her and crossed his arms, "Now what do you want to know that for?" He was searching for something, she knew it. She had to make up something, Joe was just about as bad as Lizzie when it came to secrets. "Joe, I'm new in town and thought I'd get acquainted with him. Besides, I've helped with enough medical procedures that I'm sure he'd welcome the help occasionally." Joe nodded, and told her where to find him. Vanessa thanked him and was about to move out of the shadow of the wagon when Joe grabbed her arm and pulled her back, "Wait." he said, looking over the wagon to where Adam was now exiting the saloon. "I've got a brain too you know, Vanessa. I get the feeling that your not going to see Doc Martin about helping out."

Adam's voice came over the wagon seat, "Well, well, if this isn't interesting." Vanessa looked up at him, a bright smile on her face, "Hello Adam. What are you doing in town, I thought you and your father were out looking for strays." He fidgeted a little at her jab then replied, "Well Pa had something he needed done and I volunteered." Vanessa raised an eyebrow and put her hands on her hips, but Adam just made a face at her, then spoke with Joe, "What's brought you into the sunlight this early?" Joe chuckled, "Hop Sing had a few things he wanted and Vanessa said she'd help me out." Adam nodded, "Uh-huh, like what?" Vanessa spoke up, "I'm teaching him a new dessert recipe and the pantry just doesn't have what I need to make it." Adam's eyebrows raised, "Really? He's letting you teach him something?"

To be honest, Adam was surprised that Hop Sing had let Vanessa into his kitchen at all, but two days after their return he'd found Vanessa making breakfast instead of the oriental. Vanessa smiled, "Adam, don't you worry about me and Hop Sing, we've talked it over and he's realized that with me being here, he can take that many more vacations to San Francisco to see his family. Besides, It'll be that much easier to cook enough for Hoss." The two brothers laughed and Adam tipped his hat to his wife, "Okay, don't be too long." She grinned, "I won't be." The two of them watched Adam ride away, and when he was a far amount off Vanessa turned back to Joe, "Thanks Joe. You won't tell him why I'm really here, will you?" Joe shook his head, "Nah, you just get goin' to that doctor 'fore he heads home."

Paul Martin was a good man, a smart man and a good friend of the Cartwrights. It took a lot to rattle the man, and when Vanessa Warrick showed up in his town office he was as cool as a cucumber. But when she filled him in on the details of her situation, his eyebrows rose, just a bit. "You mean to tell me that you married Adam Cartwright, and I wasn't invited?" Vanessa smiled, she'd met Paul Martin several times before, when he'd come to the ranch to help with injuries the boys had incurred over the years. "Yes, but I don't think you would have wanted to make the trip to New Orleans." Paul shook his head, "No I don't think I would have." He waved her into his exam room, just off the main office, "Vanessa, you're the daughter of one of my closest friends. If you think you're carrying Adam Cartwright's child, I'd better make danged sure for you." As Vanessa lay back on the raised bed, she had to ask, "Paul...there's something that's been bothering me."

"Oh? And what's that?" She bit her lip, "My mother told me that when you made love for the first time...it was supposed to hurt, but only for a bit."

"And?" she swallowed, "Well, when Adam and I..." he chuckled and looked up at her, "Vanessa Cartwright, I've seen the horses you ride. And I've seen how you ride. I wouldn't be surprised if you'd already worn yourself through." Vanessa nodded, "I guess that makes sense." he smiled and let her sit up. "You guess?" he went to wash his hands and spoke to her through the mirror, "Well Vanessa, I suggest you tell Little Joe to take it real easy with that wagon taking you home today. You were right, you're about eight weeks along." He turned back to her, "Have you been feeling sick in the mornings at all, more tired than usual during the day, not able to eat anything?" She shook her head, "No...but then again, I know that not every woman gets that." Paul nodded, "You're mother told me once about some of those herbs that could help the stomach upset, if you get to feeling that way, you tell one of those Cartwrights to help you. What else have you been feeling?" she thought about it, "I've been getting these really bad headaches lately, and a little dizzy, both nothing more than that." He nodded, "Alright then, you keep up with your natural remedies. Talk it over with Hop Sing, he's sure to know some things you might not." Vanessa nodded, and grabbed up her small purse. "How much do I owe you..." Paul put his hand over hers, "If you're willing to teach me some of those herbal remedies your mother taught you, and help out around town when I need you, I'll call it good." Vanessa smiled, "I'll even throw in an invitation to the wedding celebration Ben's having next week." Paul smiled broadly, and walked her out the door, "I think that's fair."

The ride home was quieter, with Joe grinning like a fool and Vanessa leaning back against the seat. "I can't believe it." Joe muttered after they were well on their way. Vanessa looked at him, raising an eyebrow, "What's so hard to believe about it?" Joe chuckled, "I've seen the way Adam woos, Vanessa. I'd think he'd spend more time talking poems and singing songs than...kissing and making love to you." Vanessa threw back her head and laughed, "Joseph Cartwright, you are the biggest tease I know!" Joe laughed also, "No, I'm not the biggest. That's a job I'll leave to Hoss." they laughed again, then Vanessa looked over at Joe, suddenly serious. "Joe, how many times have I told you to call me Nessa?" Joe smirked, "More times than I can count." She looked at him, "Well, why don't you?" He fidgeted in his seat, "Well, you see...." they were pulling into the main yard of the house, and she gripped Joe's arm and leaned in to his ear, "Don't say a thing." Joe winked at her, "I won't...but you know stuff like this isn't going to stay secret for long." She smirked and moved to get down, "You just keep quiet for a while, at least until I have a chance to tell Adam." Joe shook his head, "I don't know, Pa's had us three boys, you think he won't be able to notice the signs?" Vanessa winked at him, "Could you just do as I asked, please?" Joe got that Cartwright thinking look on his face, then grinned, "Alright, I won't tell a soul." Vanessa's eyes twinkled.

It was a four day trek from the furthest west edge of the Ponderosa to the town of Johnston, California, and another good half days ride from there to the Summerset. And those numbers were ones set down by Nicholas Warrick on his fastest horse, alone. But Solomon Jackson was driving a wagon, with a pregnant wife and with what felt like the slowest horse team he could have found. "Sol, I swear, can't you get these animals to go any faster?" Solomon looked at Faith with a sour face, "Faith, honey, you want these horses to go fast you get down out of this wagon and give them a push." Faith glowered at him, "Solomon Jackson, if you give me any more of your lip I'm going to tell Vanessa when we get to the Ponderosa." Solomon just chuckled and slapped the reins against the horses' backs. "Alright, darlin, hang on."

----------

Vanessa brought out a tray of glasses as Hop Sing followed with the pitcher of lemonade. It had been a long hot day on the trail, and now all four Cartwrights were seated on the porch. Adam had his guitar out, Hoss and Joe were playing a game of checkers and Ben was waiting to play the winner. She set the tray down and was about to pour the drinks when Joe gave her a look, "Aw, sit down Nessa. Hop Sing can get the drinks around." she glared at him, then Adam's strumming stopped and his hand grabbed her waist, "For once I agree with my little brother." he pulled her gently into the seat next to him, and went back to playing. She looked up at Hop Sing and the cook shrugged, "It okay, Ms Nessa. You sit, been on feet all day." she smirked and gave a soft chuckle. "Alright then, alright. I know when I've been overruled." she leaned back in the chair and closed her eyes, fighting a wave of nausea.

When her eyes opened, she found herself being watched carefully by not only Ben, but Little Joe as well. "What?" she asked, reaching for the special glass of lemonade that she'd made for herself and sipped it slowly. Ben smiled, "Oh it's nothing I guess. It's just that you haven't taken any good rides lately." Her eyes flicked to Little Joe, who was curiously engrossed in his checkers game. She tried to smile it away, "Oh, you've notice that have you?" Adam strummed the guitar a little bit louder, "It wasn't hard not to. There used to not be one hour you couldn't be without a horse, or riding one." She glanced back at him, "And do you not remember one of the last rides I took on the Ponderosa?" Hoss ducked his head as Elizabeth spoke up. She was seated next to Little Joe, watching the game carefully, "What are you talking about?" Vanessa poked Hoss in the ribs and chuckled, "The last time I went for a ride of any sort on Ponderosa land I got lost. Had to be rescued from a thunderstorm." Adam stopped playing and dropped down next to her, "If I remember right, it was me that ended up finding you and Jupiter in a cave." she giggled as his breath caressed her ear in a whisper, "Seems my luck with caves held up." She pushed at his chest playfully, then froze as a wagon came into the yard.

On the seat was a tall slender man and a woman with hair so fair it glittered in the setting sun. "Well now, who's this?" Ben asked no one, rising from his seat. Vanessa waited only a second for her body to catch up with her mind, and the horses to stop, before she screamed with delight and practically flew from the porch, "FAITH!" The woman on the wagon jumped down form her perch, ignoring the shout from her husband and flung her arms around Vanessa when she reached her. The girls held each other for another moment, then stepped back to look the other over, their voices melding together in a stream of words and giggles that not even Elizabeth could decipher. Solomon hopped down from the wagon and shook his head at Adam, "I should have known they'd be like this." Adam chuckled, "Like what?" Solomon waved to the girls, who were now talking about Faith's baby, and how Elizabeth would ride back with them to help her.

"They're like school girls all over again." Solomon chuckled and nodded to the other Cartwrights. Adam made the introductions, "Pa, Hoss, Little Joe, this is Solomon Jackson. Sol, this is Nessa's family." Sol smiled congenially and tilted his head to the girls, "That's my wife, Faith. I'm sure Nessa'll introduce you proper once she's caught up with her." Ben smiled, "it's alright. I think we all can figure out who she is by Nessa's reaction." The group laughed, and finally Vanessa looked behind her to them. "Oh, Faith where are my manners." she grabbed the woman's hand and led her over to them, "Faith Jackson, this is my father in law Ben, and my new brothers Hoss, and Little Joe." Faith raised an eyebrow at Joe and said, out of the corner of her mouth, "Little? Nessa, he's as big as that church steeple back home." Nessa rolled her eyes, "There's a whole story that goes with that, I'll tell you inside. Come on, I'll show you to your room." the girls put their arms around each others waist and walked inside, giggling the whole way.

Vanessa sat on Faith's bed, watching her move around the room, getting acquainted with where things were. It was beginning to be obvious that Faith was carrying a child, her belly was a little bit fuller, and her dress was cut a bit wider. "So tell me Faith. Are you happy on the Summerset." Faith straightened from putting away her clothes and stared at her friend, "Happy? Am I happy? Nessa darling, what in all the world makes you think I'm just happy there?" Vanessa raised her hands in defeat, and slid further back on the bed, crossing her legs as she'd seen the Paiute do so many times. "Okay then, tell me how you feel about living there." Faith's face brightened, and she smiled. "Oh Nessa, you know what it's like there. The orchards just coming out of blossom and the petals are all over the ground. The last winter was thick with snow, and we're still dealing with a lot more water than the cisterns can take..." as she continued to talk, Vanessa laid back on the bed, putting a hand beneath her head to prop herself up.

Faith stopped suddenly, and put a hand over her belly, "Whoa, there little one. You've still got time." Vanessa smiled, and sat back up as her friend joined her on the bed, "It's really dancing around on you, huh." Faith nodded, then looked carefully at her friend. "Are you okay, Nessa? You look different." Vanessa smiled, and looked away, "You always did have a way about reading minds, Faith. She started playing with the quilt and swallowed. "I haven't taken a good ride for a long time...I was just thinking that I won't be able to for a while." Faith smiled and said, "You get me a horse, and I'll go along with you. I wonder if we can't get those boys of ours chasing after us. Solomon hasn't let me on a horse since I got this way." Vanessa giggled, "I can understand why. Your mother had a hard time with you." Faith shrugged, "I am not my mother." Vanessa giggled some more, and sighed, "Oh Faith, it's good to see you again. I'm beginning to think I shouldn't have run off to New Orleans." Faith giggled herself, "Ah, but if you hadn't, Solomon wouldn't have moved us into the big bedroom and maybe you wouldn't be married now."

Vanessa laid her head on the bed, and took a deep slow breath, "Faith, you remember that hot spring at the Summerset we found that one year?" Faith nodded, laying down next to her, "Yes, I remember. Your mother nearly tore the hide from your back when she discovered where you went." Vanessa smiled briefly, and waved her hand to her face as though she was warm. Faith put her hand on her friends forehead, but let the matter drop. Vanessa shuffled herself off the bed, and went to the door, "You get some sleep, Faith. I know that ride's a hard one. We'll talk more in the morning." Faith smiled, and stood to change into her nightdress, "Send Solomon in here would you?" Vanessa smiled, and waved good-night to her friend.

Vanessa closed the door on her and Adam's room, and leaned against the door. He was just shrugging out of his shirt when she entered, and smiled over his shoulder at her. "You're in rather late, aren't you?" she smirked, "I've had two years worth of catching up to do." she moved away from the door. She sat on the bed and reached behind herself to undo the dresses ties when his hands met hers. "Here, let me." he whispered, pulling her against him and kissing her exposed neck. She smiled and wriggled against him, "Adam..." He smiled against her skin and laid her down, "I told you, you're late."

The next morning found Vanessa not wanting to get up. She put a hand over her eyes and rolled onto her back, 'Vanessa Cartwright, you had to say it. You had to say you weren't feeling sick.' Adam had woken up earlier, kissed her awake and then gone downstairs for breakfast. 'breakfast...' the thought made her stomach flip and she rolled back onto her side, curling her arm around her middle. She lay there for another moment, then forced herself to get up... slowly. Once on her feet, she wrapped her robe around herself, and splashed some water on her face.

It was cold, and made her gasp. "Oh boy." she whispered and braced herself against the stand as a wave of dizziness hit her. Taking a deep breath, she dried her face off and went about getting dressed. She chose a shirt of a soft blue silk that had sleeves that tightened at her wrists, along with her favorite black riding skirt. She was running a brush through her hair when the door opened again, and Elizabeth walked in. "Well?" she asked, closing the door behind her. Vanessa turned to her and saw the apple in her hand, "Well what?" Her cousins eyes widened, "Nessa! You know what I'm talking about....tell me!" she crossed the room quickly, handed Vanessa the apple then put her hands on her hips, "Well?" Vanessa rolled her eyes and bit into the apple. Elizabeth began braiding her hair, "And if I am?" Elizabeth's cheeks swelled slightly, "Are you?" Vanessa stood, calmly went to the door and checked that they were alone, then turned back to her cousin, nodding excitedly. Elizabeth jumped up and down, but was careful to not let out the squeal that Vanessa knew was just below the surface. Vanessa shook her head, and looked at herself in the mirror, "Well now that you're happy, I was going to skip breakfast, but thanks for the apple. Now I'm going to take that ride Adam was teasing me about last night." Elizabeth stopped dancing around and stared at her, "Vanessa!" her voice was louder than she intended and put a hand over her mouth.

Vanessa looked back at her cousin, and grinned, "Relax. It's me!" she walked out of the room, grabbing her riding gloves from the nightstand as she left. Elizabeth grabbed up her skirts and followed after her. "Vanessa!" they were just short of the stairs when she finally reached her, and turned her around by her arm. "Vanessa," she hissed through her teeth, glancing at the stairs, "You can't get on that beast of yours. Not..." Vanessa grinned, released her arm from her grip and tossed the apple core at her, "Relax. Lizzie. I'll take Faith with me." Elizabeth hooted, "Oh really!" Vanessa wiggled her eyebrows at her cousin, then tore off down the stairs with Elizabeth shouting after her. "VANESSA! VANESSA CARTWRIGHT YOU GET BACK HERE!"

Faith was waiting outside riding side saddle on a shorter gelding, holding Jupiter's reins as Vanessa tore from the house, pulling on her gloves and gracefully jumping astride the saddle. "Vanessa!" Elizabeth pulled back as Jupiter reared back when Vanessa pulled on his reins and the two old friends took off from the main yard at a full gallop.

Solomon looked up from the horse breaking corral as Elizabeth's voice carried to them, "VANESSA!" she shouted again, her hands flying to her hips. She spun around, trying to find someone when Ben came running over to her, "Miss Elizabeth, what's wrong?" She fanned her face, trying to calm herself, reminding herself that Vanessa hadn't told anyone else that she was pregnant, "It's....It's..."

Solomon nudged Adam's shoulder, and pointed back at the house as Ben leaned in to listen to the frightened girl, "She was just screaming after Nessa as though...." his eyes scanned the yard, "Where's Faith?" Adam stood on the rail and looked around himself, "I don't see her." The two men looked at each other, then over to Ben, who was now striding purposefully over to them. Solomon swallowed, "Adam, I have a bad feeling about this." Ben reached them, and said, "Solomon, I think you two better get some horses saddled." Solomon lowered his head into his palm, "They went for a ride didn't they? Ben nodded, and glanced back at Elizabeth, "And that's not all..." he looked at his son, a worried look on his face.

The wind flew past the two girls as they led their horses easily across the open range, jumping exposed rocks and circling trees until their cheeks were red from the snap of the air and their horses were breathing heavily. Vanessa reined Jupiter in just short of the butte, holding out her hand for Faith to do the same. The girls glanced at each other, then burst into a fit of giggles. Vanessa talked first, "I'd be surprised if it takes them an hour to find us." Faith nodded, a new gleam in her eyes, "It's been a long time, Nessa. I'd forgotten that you're the better rider." Nessa tossed her head, her braid having come undone earlier, "No, Faith. I just get the better horses." Faith let out a great belly laugh, "Come on, Nessa. I want a closer look at that lake." Vanessa smiled, "Alright, there's a path over this way...if I remember right."

They picked their way down the hill, and soon were watching the waves lap against their horses hooves. Jupiter lowered his head and drank greedily. "Well, there it is. One of the most beautiful sights on this whole ranch." she said, looking over at Faith. The other woman nodded, "You were right, Nessa. This place is close to heaven." the new Cartwright smiled, and patted Jupiter's neck. The great gelding reared his head back, and flicked his ears. He only did that when he heard someone approaching, and Nessa pointed it out to Faith, "I think we got company." Faith looked down to the right then left, "I don't see anything."

There was a sound behind them, and both girls looked back up the hill to see two very angry husbands at the top of the hill. "They've still got a few minutes to reach us." Nessa said, an evil glint coming to her eye, "What do you think?" Faith glanced to her.

Adam brought a hand to his mouth and shouted, "NESSA! NESSA YOU GET UP HERE!" his wife didn't answer him, didn't even look at him. Adam glanced over to Solomon, who set his jaw and shouted himself, "FAITH!"

The girls had heard them, there was no way not to. Faith raised an eyebrow at her friend, then grinned mischievously. "Why not. This'll be the last I'm on a horse for a while anyway." Vanessa smiled broadly, then kicked Jupiter into another rear and the girls took off again.

Adam swore roundly and kicked Sport forward, "Come on, Sol. Those girls are set on killing themselves." Sol grinned in agreement, and followed Adam closely before they reached the shore and let their mounts loose.

Vanessa had been right when she'd said it would take them time to reach the beach, and once their horses hooves hit the hard packed sand, the girls were a fair ways ahead of them. Vanessa risked a glanced to her side at Faith and said, "I'm going to let him loose, Faith. I'll see you back at the ranch." Faith waved to her, and Vanessa urged Jupiter forward, letting the great beast open his stride and felt a rush of joy. It had been so long since she'd really run a horse, even back in New Orleans, where the fields had simply begged for a good ride, she hadn't been able to move. Aunt Sarah would have insisted on her riding side saddle, and Vanessa couldn't give the horse a proper rein that way. It felt off, in some way, she just couldn't get that same feel of oneness with a horse that she could astride. The wind whipped at her face, her hair started to tangle behind her head, but she had never felt more free in her life.

Jupiter leapt over a pile of rocks, and she absorbed the landing like a pro. There was a thunder of hooves behind her, a different cadence than Jupiter's, and she knew her time was almost up. Chewing on her lip, she let her hold on the rein slacken and Jupiter slowed. Adam came up even with her, and grabbed the reins from her loose grip, pulling both Sport and Jupiter up short of a great wall of rock and dirt. Once he'd stopped her, he dismounted then grabbed her by the waist quickly and pulled her from Jupiter's back, "What were you thinking!" he shouted, keeping his hands firmly on her waist and staring angrily into her eyes. She let the corner of her mouth lift, then drop at his fierce look. "Adam. I've been riding horses ever since I was..." his hands tightened on her waist and pulled her to him, "I don't like the idea of my wife riding out like a mad woman, especially when she's pregnant with my child." She couldn't stop herself, "So it would be okay if I was carrying someone elses baby?" Adam growled and lifted her onto Sports back, "We'll discuss this later." He grabbed her leg as she was about to throw it over the other side, "And you're riding side all the way home." her eyes widened, "Adam that's not fair!"

Adam swallowed his shout and glared at her as he tied off Jupiter's reins to follow them, "Vanessa, you go riding off at a full gallop across the Ponderosa, knowing full well that you're pregnant and my making you ride side saddle isn't fair?" She raised an eyebrow, "Well if you wanted to tag a long all you had to do was ask." His eyes were dangerous, and she closed her mouth. Vanessa sighed, "Adam, I was trying to tell you that I've been riding horses since before I could even get astride a pony. My mother rode horses every day she was carrying me and I'm here ain't I?" He threw his leg up behind her and gripped her tight around her waist, sliding as close as he could to her, "But you're not your mother, and that's my child you've got in your belly."

Vanessa bit her lip and hung her head, getting into a verbal battle unprepared with Adam was a foolish thing to do, and now he was angry!

"It's my child too, in case you've forgotten, and if I say I'm okay to go riding then I'm going to." she was being stubborn, but there was no way she was going to let this drop easily. She felt Adam take a deep breath, steadying himself against his temper, "Vanessa, you're lucky I don't make you walk back." She shifted just enough to look him in the face, "Adam, you stop this horse." He didn't, "Now!" she grabbed the reins herself, and Sport skittered. Adam calmed him down, then stared down at her.

"What."

She lifted herself up on her hands, twisting in the saddle and letting her right knee rest over his thigh. It was a rather intimate way to sit, and she could see his eyes were softening, "Adam, ever since you got here, all you've done is yell my ears off about my going for a ride with an old friend." He raised an eyebrow at her, "And?" she crossed her arms, her balance completely dependent on his arm behind her, "And I'm just curious how you found out about this child."

"Elizabeth told Pa, and he told me." she nodded, "Uh-huh. Well then, is that all you have to say to me?" he just looked at her, "About what?" She couldn't stop the smile that curled her lips, and she took his face in her hands, her eyes glittering, "Adam...I'm pregnant." His eyes flashed and he smiled, his dimples showing. She traced his smile with her fingers, "There now, that's better." Adam raised an eyebrow again, and that evil gleam returned to his eye, "Better? I'll show you what's better." His arm behind her tightened, and she was crushed to him in a heavy kiss.

They drew even with Solomon and Faith; Faith was still atop her borrowed horse, but Solomon had a tight grip on her reins. "Mornin, Nessa." he said, tipping his hat to her. Vanessa made a face at him, and Sol let out a chuckle, "Well Adam, I should have warned you. You got yourself a real spitfire there." his eyes twinkled as his wife said, "I'm just glad you took her off my hands." Adam's own chuckle rumbled against Vanessa's back, and she leaned against her husband. "I know about her temper, Sol. Don't worry about me, I can handle her." his arm around her waist tightened momentarily and he kissed the top of her head. "Come on, let's get these two back home."


	15. Epilogue

"Faith?" Vanessa tried as her friend talked about setting up the main room for the ceremony.

Faith ignored her, so she tried again. "Faith." Still nothing, and she was losing her temper, "FAITH!" she finally shouted, standing and putting her hands on her hips, glaring at the girl. Faith stopped talking and looked up at Vanessa, surprised. "What? Did I say something wrong?" Vanessa took a deep breath, bit her lip and shook her head, "No...nothing." she glanced around the room, "I...I just need some fresh air." she walked quickly to the door, shutting it behind her. Faith raised an eyebrow at the closed door, "If she's not careful she's going to catch cold out there." Little Joe looked at Hoss, who shrugged. Joe shook his head, grabbed Vanessa's shawl and walked out after her.

Vanessa was in her usual spot, standing next to the corral staring at the sky. In the few days since Adam's departure for San Francisco she'd been coming out here each night. Just leaned against the corral post and stared up at the sky. "Here, Faith's worrying about you." he put the thick shawl around Vanessa's shoulders, giving her a brief hug in the process. "Thank you Joe." she kicked her foot against the post, and sighed. "I shouldn't have spoken up like that." Joe smirked, "Why not? The way that Faith was going on and on for you,** I** was about to say something." she chuckled softly, "Joe..."

She turned around, tying the shawl around herself. "Joe, I just don't know." she bit her lip and leaned against him as he spread his arms across the top rail of the corral. "You don't know about what?" she looked at the ground, "This whole marriage thing." Joe laughed, "It's a little late for you to be having second thoughts ain't it?" she giggled and poked him in the ribs, "No...not about being married at all. But all this planning that Faith's got going; all this about aisles and bouquets and what not's giving me headache." Joe tightened his arm around her, "From everything I know about girls, I thought that's all you ever thought about. Planning out your own wedding." She looked at him, "Joseph Cartwright, you think that's what's happening in there?" she pointed to the house, and Joe shrugged. "No...not really."

Vanessa sighed again and closed her eyes, "Little Joe, when I was a young girl, I used to think about things like this. I even had the perfect place picked out. It was this little glade, not much bigger than the main room in the house. In the spring the grass was soft enough you could go barefoot, and on the far end of it were these two great oak trees. They were so big, and so old, that their branches had grown together, making the perfect archway. It was my favorite place on the ranch..." she kicked her foot again and looked back at him. "I suppose I'll have to get used to the idea of not having that outdoor setting. At least I've already got my dress." her hands and eyes went to her still flat belly, "In a few weeks that'll have to change too." Joe walked forward, wrapping her in a tight hug, "Come on inside, Nessa."

She raised an eyebrow at him, "You called me Nessa." he smirked, "Haven't I always?" He walked her back inside, and they were surprised to find that Faith and Solomon had already gone to bed. Hoss was banking the fire, "Good night Hoss." she said, climbing the stairs. She made it to her room and closed the door. Lighting the bedside lamp, she knelt next to her hope chest against the far wall; lifting the lid, she ran her fingers over the white silken fabric of her wedding gown. The shoulders were rolled down to sit just below her real shoulder line, with a tight bodice that emphasized her slim waist and fell away into a full skirt that swirled when she moved. Closing the lid, she shook her head and removed her dress. The bed for the last few days had felt too large with Adam gone, too large and too cold. Curling around his pillow, she blew out the lamp and tried to go to sleep.

Joe watched her walk upstairs, "Hoss, we've got to stop this wedding." Hoss looked at his little brother as though he was crazy, "Joe, I don't think that's gonna happen." Little Joe shook his head, "No, not like that. I just talked with Vanessa and she's not liking what Faith's got in mind." he sat down on the table and watched his brother. "Hoss, she's related to us now and she's really not happy." Hoss sat on the hearth and leaned forward on his knees, "Alright, how do you think we can make her happy?" Joe shook his head, "I don't..." he stopped, and sat up straight, "Hoss, I have an idea."

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Faith Jackson was a fair woman, but when it came to Vanessa Warrick Cartwright, she could be danged stubborn. "You want me to what?" Little Joe adjusted his hat on his head and said it again, "I want you to get Vanessa dressed in that wedding gown she's got and then blindfold her. Hoss and I will take care of the rest." Faith shook her head and put her hands on her hips, "I really wish I knew what you two were up to." Hoss grinned, "Don't you worry none about that, just go on upstairs and get that sister of ours into that dress."

Faith knocked on Vanessa's door, and smiled when she was greeted by a groan. "Nessa? Nessa sweetheart, it's Faith. May I come in?" Another groan, and Faith opened the door. Vanessa was standing over the wash basin, her hair falling in strings around her face and shoulders. "Faith, I'm not exactly up for company this morning." she whispered, then shivered as another dry heave racked her stomach. Faith put a hand over her nose as the smell of bile assaulted her nose. Vanessa stood slightly and poured some of the water into the basin, diluting the smell. Vanessa was still in her nightdress, not even having bothered with the robe that lay strewn across a chair near the bed. "Nessa...I think we should try on that dress of yours again. Just to make sure your stomach isn't going to stretch it too much."

Vanessa raised an eyebrow at her friend, "If you think so. It's in the chest over there." she pointed to it, then bent over the basin again. Thankfully nothing, not even bile, came from the jumping jacks her stomach was doing now. Faith knelt and removed the dress, the white satin puddling around Faith's shorter legs. "Come on. I've got Hop Sing bringing up some hot pails of water for you to wash your hair in, and then we can play around with your hair for how you want it to look." Vanessa closed her eyes, and put the robe around her shoulders, "Faith Jackson, you sure know when to sweet talk a friend." Faith smiled to show her teeth, "I know."

Adam had been gone for seven days. Seven days too long in his mind, not when he had the most beautiful woman in the world warming his bed back home. But then again, not even Vanessa could have talked him out of getting this gift for her. She deserved it, and was worth every dollar he'd spent on the grand piano that was lashed tight to the wagon he drove. He couldn't forget how she'd looked, seated behind the one in her aunts parlor, light streaming in from the windows...in that red dress. She looked the vision, a vision he couldn't wait to see again. The wagon rolled into the main yard of the house, but only his father came out to greet him. "Welcome home Adam." he said, clapping his son on the back and looking over the wagon load, "So this is it?" Adam nodded, lifting a bit of the tarpaulin cover. "I just hope she likes it."

Ben smiled, "I'm sure she will." he waved over to a clump of hands over by the bunk house, "Come on boys, let's get this inside." It took ten of them to finally lift the hefty piece, and then roll it carefully into the nook between the stairs and the study. Adam wiped his forehead as she stood up, "Well, where is she?" Ben smiled, and gripped his sons shoulder. "you'd better wash up and get changed."

"Why?" Ben just grinned, "Those brothers of yours have a present of their own to give her."

Vanessa shifted on the seat, her eyes now covered with a rag, and grumbled again, "Hoss, where are you taking me?" she felt Hoss chuckle beside her, "Now, Nessa, would I be taking you anywhere you wouldn't be safe?" She smiled evilly, "Well, there was this one time..." Hoss laughed, "I mean recently. That time when we were kids doesn't count." Vanessa giggled, "Alright fine... But where are you taking me that I have to be blindfolded?" Hoss didn't answer her, just laughed delightedly. "Hoss?" she patted his arm, "Hoss, I think you'd better pull this rig over." she patted his arm, and the other hand went to her belly. Hoss slowed the wagon, but didn't stop. "Nessa are you serious this time or are you just trying to get a peek at where we are?" Nessa stopped rubbing her belly, and scowled...but it wasn't nearly as effective as it could have been if her face wasn't half covered. Hoss chuckled again, "Don't worry, were' almost there."

About an hour later the buggy came to a stop, and she felt the seat shift as Hoss got out. She listened to his footfalls get closer to her, then his voice say, "Okay, Vanessa. I'm going to get you out of the buggy now. Don't worry, I'm not gonna drop you." Vanessa smiled, "Like you did when I was ten?" Hoss huffed, "No, not like that at all." His grip was firm, but gentle as he lifted her clear from the buggy, then dropped one arm to beneath her knees. "I take it you're not going to let me see where we're going then?" he smiled, then checked when he realized she couldn't see it, "Not yet."

She could feel the sun warm on her face, then the sudden coolness, as though they were in shade. "Hoss...are we in some trees?" she asked, trying to shift around in his arms. "Hang on, just a little bit further then you can see." she tightened her grip around his neck, and bit her lip. Hoss or not, she didn't like the secrets like this. There was another set of footsteps, then Little Joe's voice, "Well hello brother. Whatdaya think?" Hoss must have nodded, and must have been smiling cause she heard it in his voice, "I think it looks great. But I'm not the one you should be asking." Little Joe must have smiled too, then he said, "Well, let's ask her!" She was shifted again, and her feet came to rest on soft ground. Hoss turned her around to face him, then removed the rag from her eyes, "Well? What do you think?" he asked.

She blinked several times, adjusting to the sudden light, then looked around them, "Think of what?" Joe rolled his eyes, put his hand on her shoulders and turned her around, "That." he pointed to what they'd been working on for the last couple days. They were in a natural stand of trees, but a clearing had been made, and the grass beneath her feet looked as green as the fresh green sprouts. It wasn't perfectly circular, more of an oval, but the tress were tall and gave the sunlight a fight to make it onto the earth, sprinkling it on the ground. "Oh!" her breath came out in a gasp, and her hands flew to her mouth, "You boys did this?" Hoss nodded, and Joe crossed his arms over his chest, "So...what do you think?" She turned back to the clearing, "I don't know what to say..." Joe came forward and stood next to her, "Well all you'll have to say is a few vows and 'I do'." she stared at him, "You're kidding. After all that Faith was planning, how did you talk her out of." Hoss chuckled, "Nessa, our big brother isn't the only one who can talk circles around anyone." Her eyes widened, "Ben?" they nodded, and then Joe looked behind him. "Uh-oh..we've got to hurry. Nessa come with me, Hoss you stall them."

"Stall who?" she asked, or tried to as Joe took her hand and led her to a small log on the edge of the clearing. "Here, you sit here..." he knelt and spread the skirt of her gown around her. She grabbed his wrist, "Joe, what are you doing?" he looked up at her and winked, "Just trust me." she raised an eyebrow at him, "Joe, should I trust you?" he smiled, and finished what he was doing. "You feeling alright?"

"Yes. So far." he nodded, "Good." She could just hear horse hooves beyond him, and he stood again, "You stay right there." She was about to call out to him when he disappeared into the shade of the trees. Sighing heavily, she leaned back against her arm and looked around the clearing. How had they done it? She knew the Ponderosa fairly well, she'd thought, but this... She couldn't remember anything like this. After that disastrous escape a week ago, she'd promised Adam that until they were sure that a ride wouldn't hurt her or the baby, she could only go out with an escort. It used to be Adam until he'd left suddenly for San Francisco seven days ago.

Seven days...she'd been alone for seven days. She shook her head and grinned, no wonder her father taught her about ranch life; he must have hated being away from her mother as much as Nessa hated being separated from Adam. Adam...her grin changed into a warm smile as she thought about her husband. There were footsteps off to her right, and she looked up at whomever it was.

There he stood, shadowed against the speckled sunlight, dressed in his best suit and staring at her. She giggled, "Adam, we really need to stop meeting like this." she could feel his smile as he walked towards her, "Nessa..." he whispered, sitting on the log next to her.

Ben looked at his youngest two, and smiled, "Well now, that's a sight worth waiting for." Hoss looked at his father, confused, "What do you mean, Pa?" Ben nodded towards their elder brother and his new wife, "I've waited a long time for Adam to find a woman he thought worthy. When Vanessa came to the ranch two years ago, I saw the look in her eye; it was the same look your mothers had when they looked at me, and she had it everytime she glanced at Adam. It wasn't until she left, and he returned alone that I saw it in his. Your brother loves that girl, more than I think even he knows or understands." Joe raised an eyebrow and glanced up at his father, "That explains a lot." Ben smiled, and put a hand on his shoulder, "Is everyone ready?" Hoss nodded, "Yep. Just waiting on those two." They looked back at the newlyweds, and watched as Adam helped Vanessa get to her feet, lifting her as gently as he would a newborn calf. "Let's go." Ben said, and the three remaining Cartwright's entered the glade. Adam looked over at his family, sliding his hands around his wife. "Nessa tells me that she was brought here blindfolded." he glanced down at her and then turned back to his brothers, "What are you three planning."

Joe smiled, "Nessa told me about it a few days ago, about how she'd always wanted to have the ceremony outside," Nessa's eyebrows raised, "Joe...you did all this because of that?" Joe nodded and continued, "So I got the idea and Hoss and I've been working on this for the last few days. It took a while to find a stand large enough, then to clear out all the underbrush, but I think it works." Adam smiled, "Alright so you've got the setting she wants, but did you think about bringing the preacher?" Hoss smiled, "Ah, come on Adam. You think we'd forget something like that?" the man appeared from the woods behind the Cartwrights and nodded to the couple. Now it was Nessa turn to object, "Everyone but Faith." there came a cough from behind her and Nessa turned slightly to see her friend and her husband standing hand in hand. Adam looked around the clearing, then smiled down at his wife, "Well now. That's just about everyone important don't you think?" Vanessa returned his smile, and nodded, "Alright, Peter." Adam said to the preacher, "Let's finish what we started in New Orleans."

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_**(FIVE MONTHS LATER)**_

The five Cartwright's sat around the dinning table, eating supper. Vanessa sat next to Adam, across from Hoss, and her eyes were watching the last steak on the server plate. Her own plate was only half empty, but she knew that it would be soon enough. Just whether or not she would be able to get to that steak before Hoss would be a challenge. It had been like this for the last few months as her belly expanded with Adam's child. It hadn't come to much yet, just looks or a nod, but tonight Hop Sing had made some of the softest steak and well mashed potatoes that she'd ever tasted. The steamed vegetables were already gone, most having gone to her plate when the first served. But that steak was calling to her...or at least, her large belly. There! Hoss was reaching for the plate, but he wouldn't get that steak. Her fork was faster than his, and stabbed into the thick slab before he could even blink. Hoss's eyes widened, and he stared balefully at Vanessa, "Aw, come on Nessa." she didn't blink, just kept her grip on her fork and started lifting it to her own plate. "Pa that's not fair!" Hoss whined, but Ben and Adam only laughed, "You'd better give in son. You'll be surprised at how much Nessa'll be able to eat fro a while." he winked at Adam, "After all, she is eating for two." Vanessa smirked and took a swallow of water, "Sometimes it feels like more than that." She winced and put a hand on her swollen stomach, "Well one things for sure, he fight's like a Cartwright." Adam's hand fell to her stomach, something he'd been doing of late everytime she mentioned a kick, and he grinned, "Let's just hope this one loves his mother like the rest of the Cartwrights."

That night, Vanessa found herself dreaming of the orchard on the Summerset. _It was spring, and the apple blossoms were in full bloom and it smelled heavenly. She walked over to one of the trees, grabbing a small handful of blossom and breathing deeply. "Aren't they beautiful?" a woman asked, and Vanessa turned around. "Mother?" Jennifer smiled broadly at her adopted daughter, a small bundle in her arms. "Oh my little Nessa. How you've grown. And finally married to Adam I see." Vanessa smiled herself, then looked at Jennifer. "What are you doing here mother..." her hands flew to her large belly and she asked fearfully, "There's nothing wrong is there?" Jennifer shook her head and walked forward, revealing the bundle in her arms to be a baby. "No...I was just checking on your son. He's a fine looking boy, Nessa. He looks just like his father."_ Vanessa gasped and opened her eyes, pulling away from Adam as she sat up. "Nessa?" he grumbled, half sitting up, "Is something wrong with the baby? Are you alright?" she shook her head, trying to clear it. His hands were instantly holding her, "Nessa?" she put her hand over his and smiled, "Don't worry, nothing's wrong. I just...I just had a bad dream is all." He kissed her shoulder, "Anything you want to talk about?" She grinned, "I get the feeling that what you've got in mind doesn't include talking." he shook his head, "No...not really."

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_**(EARLY SPRING, MIDDAY)**_

Hop Sing and Vanessa were talking in the kitchen, preparing lunch for the few hands on the Ponderosa when Vanessa let out a soft cry and grabbed onto the small table. "MisNessa?" Hop Sing asked, coming to her side, "What wrong?" Vanessa took a deep breath, her hands falling to her belly. "Well, unless I just wet my skirts, this baby's coming now." she looked up at the cook and smiled, "You'd best send Matthew for Adam," he moved to get the hand when Vanessa cried out again, "but first, you'd best get me a glass of that tea I told you about."

Adam and his brothers were about an hours ride away form the ranch house when their ranch hand Matthew came galloping up to their small campfire, his face flushed and horse near coated in sweat. "Matt, what's got you so..." Adam began, but Matt bent over, hands on his knees. "It's.....It's... Nessa....sent....move.....fast..." Adam went to the boy and held him up by his shoulders, "What?" Matt took a deep breath and said again, "Baby...Nessa...move...now..." Adam started, then spun on his heel and ran to Sport. Hoss and Joe hadn't heard the conversation, but they could gather enough by the way Adam tore out of camp.

Like the devil himself was after him.

Doc Martin met him in the main yard, and it confirmed his suspicions. "She's steady for a while yet, we could be facing a good long birth though." the Doc explained as he walked inside with Adam. Adam hadn't even a foot in the house when Vanessa let out a gut wrenching wail, the open door enough to let her voice through to his ears. He raced the doctor upstairs to their room, and saw her, lying back on the bed, pillows behind her back and blankets drawn down to her hips. She was leaning back on those pillows, her face bathed in sweat. She looked over at the open door, and tried to smile, but her belly clenched and she looked away, obviously trying not to scream. Adam moved fast, sitting down on the chair beside the bed and taking her shoulders in his hands. "Easy girl, easy. I'm here." she grinned, "Adam, I'm your wife not your horse." he smiled and wiped a cool cloth across her brow, "I know...believe me. I know." she set her teeth and hissed slowly. "Adam I swear, this baby's gonna be the death of me." He chuckled and looked over at Paul. Paul smiled himself, "Don't you worry Vanessa. I've heard plenty of wives say that same thing and they all live through for another round." she laughed and leaned back against the pillows, letting Adam wipe her face one more time.

Two hours passed, and the contractions were getting closer together. Five minutes apart, three, one. When Vanessa let out a cry to wake the dead, Paul Martin bent over and grinned widely, "Alright, Nessa. I need you to start pushing for me." She nodded, and gripped Adam's left arm tightly as he helped her sit up. She let out another great cry, and laid her head into Adam's shoulder, trying to muffle her screams. Adam moved his head and kissed her brow as Paul coached her through. She'd done this so many times before for other women, why did it feel different now? She should have been able to do this alone, dang it! "I can see a head, Nessa. Come on, one more good push and you'll be holding him." Vanessa took a deep breath, pulled her face out of Adam's shoulder, and bore down. Her mouth opened in a shout, but she was soon drowned out by the one her child gave by being forced from her body.

She glanced at Adam, whose eyes were glued to the doctor, "Paul...what..." the doctor wrapped the baby in a soft towel and grinned at the new father. "It's a boy." Vanessa said, leaning back on the pillows. Both the doctor and Adam gave her a sharp look, "Now how did you know that?" Paul asked, bringing the whimpering bundle over to his father. Vanessa smiled weakly and held up her arms for her son.

"A mother knows." she whispered, tracing the thick black hairline on his small brow. She brought him up and kissed his forehead gently, "A mother knows."


End file.
